Tag: fantasy and affairs

People trust AI more than their partner with their deepest secrets, poll reveals

The key findings

* More than a third of people now trust AI with personal secrets over their own partner, with many saying it feels less judgemental and emotionally safer.
* Brits are confiding in AI about relationship doubts, sexual fantasies, thoughts of cheating and even past affairs – conversations they avoid having at home.
* Experts warn that while AI offers a consequence‑free space to open up, relying on it instead of honest communication could deepen cracks in real‑world relationships.
* Study conducted by IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s largest extramarital dating site.

Brits are now more likely to confide in artificial intelligence than the person they share a bed with. And, it seems the biggest threat to communication in relationships might not be another person – but a robot.

A new poll of 1,800 members of IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s largest extramarital dating site, has revealed that more than a third (38%) would rather share a personal secret with AI than open up to their partner.

In fact, 27% admit they’ve already told an AI chatbot something deeply personal that they have never confessed to their other half.

And it’s not just convenience driving the trend. One in five (21%) say they feel “less judged” by AI than they do by their partner – suggesting that for some, a machine feels safer than a marriage.

So what exactly are people telling these bots? The most common confession involves relationship doubts, with 44% admitting they’ve turned to AI to vent about concerns regarding their partner instead of addressing the issue directly at home.

More than a third (36%) say they’ve used AI to discuss their sexual fantasies – conversations they felt uncomfortable initiating with their partner.

Meanwhile, 31% have confided in AI about thoughts of cheating, and 22% say they’ve opened up about regrets over past affairs rather than revisiting those conversations with the person they’re with.

One married mother-of-two from Surrey, who asked to remain anonymous, says she turned to AI after struggling to open up to her husband of 15 years. “I love my husband, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell him I’d been having doubts about our future. Every time I tried, I’d see his face fall and I’d bottle it. So I typed it into ChatGPT instead. It felt ridiculous at first – pouring my heart out to a robot. But it didn’t interrupt, didn’t get defensive, didn’t look hurt. It just… listened. I know it’s not real, but it was just good to talk about my feelings openly.”

Expert comment from Jessica Leoni

Jessica Leoni, sex and relationships expert at IllicitEncounters.com, says the results reflect a growing emotional shift. “AI doesn’t roll its eyes, raise its voice or bring up something you said three years ago,” she said. “For many people, that makes it feel like a safer space to explore uncomfortable thoughts.”

She believes the appeal lies in the absence of consequence. “When you confess something to your partner, it can change the dynamic of the relationship. There are emotional repercussions. With AI, there’s no fallout. No hurt feelings. No awkward silence.”

But Leoni warns that relying on technology instead of communication could deepen existing cracks. “Using AI as a sounding board isn’t necessarily harmful,” she explained. “In fact, it can sometimes help people organise their thoughts. The problem comes when it replaces honest dialogue rather than preparing you for it.”

She adds that the types of secrets people are sharing are particularly telling. “Relationship doubts, sexual fantasies, thoughts about cheating – these are exactly the conversations that could save a relationship if handled well. But people are too scared to have them. They’d rather test the waters with a robot than risk real vulnerability with a human. And that’s a tragedy.”

Results
What have you confided in AI about rather than speaking with your partner?

Relationship doubts – 44%
Sexual fantasies – 36%
Thoughts about cheating – 31%
Regrets about past affairs – 22%
General relationship advice – 20%
Other – 8%

Further Reading

For more on this topic, explore discreet dating on Illicit Encounters.

Study reveals nearly everyone is guilty of mentally cheating during sex

The key findings

* Following the hotly anticipated release of Gillian Anderson’s new book Want, IllicitEncounters.com has unveiled a revealing study on sexual fantasies.

* New research shows that a whopping 90% of people have thought about someone else whilst having sex with their partners at some stage of their relationship.

* Men are more likely to fantasise about celebrities, whilst women are thinking about ex partners – and surprisingly, farmers.

* Scenarios at work are the biggest turn on for men, and sun-soaked beaches are the number one location for female fantasies.

A shocking new study has uncovered that nearly everyone is guilty of mentally straying during sex. 

The research was conducted by extramarital dating site IllicitEncounters.com following the release of actress Gillian Anderson’s highly anticipated book, Want – a collection of steamy sexual fantasies compiled by actress Gillian Anderson, which has sparked fresh conversations about the hidden depths of human desire.

Polling 2,000 participants – evenly split between men and women – IllicitEncounters.com, which will be celebrating its 20th birthday in October, revealed that a staggering 90% of people have fantasised about someone other than their partner while getting intimate at some point in their relationship. 

In fact, 86% of men and an astonishing 97% of women admit to letting their imaginations wander to someone other than their partner while having sex.

For men, celebrities dominate the fantasy world, with 19% admitting to thinking about famous faces. Ex-partners and coworkers also feature prominently, at 16% and 15% respectively. 

Women, however, are more likely to fantasise about exes (22%) and coworkers (19%), but the real surprise? Farmers make an unexpected appearance, ranking fourth among women’s most fantasised about figures. This curious attraction may be tied to the ongoing public fascination with Jeremy Clarkson, who was recently crowned the UK’s sexiest man for the second year running by female users of IllicitEncounters.com.

When it comes to the settings for these fantasies, men imagine steamy scenarios at work (25%), in a park (18%), or even on a plane (12%). Hotels also make an appearance, and some fantasise about romantic rendezvous in lifts and even police stations. 

For women, it’s all about sun-soaked beaches (23%), work-related trysts (19%), and hotel escapades (15%). Clearly a fan of the outdoors when it comes to getting intimate, fields, parks and forests are also featured in the most popular fantasy locations.

Surprisingly, the vast majority of people – 89% – don’t view fantasising about someone else as cheating, and only 11% see it as a form of infidelity.

Expert comment from Jessica Leoni

Jessica Leoni, sex and relationships expert at IllicitEncounters.com, commented on the results of the study, “Mental fantasies are a natural part of human sexuality. While they might seem like a form of cheating to some, for most, they’re simply a way to explore desires and enhance sexual experiences. 

It’s important to communicate with your partner and understand each other’s boundaries and expectations, but now there’s confirmation – if you’re thinking about someone else during sex… it’s normal!”

‘Kink-teresting’ poll reveals keeping sexual secrets could lead to infidelity

The key findings

* 86% of people are keeping their sexual fantasies a secret from their partner
* BDSM tops kinky list of secret sexual fantasies people aren’t willing to disclose to their other half
* Poll conducted by IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s largest extramarital dating site
 

According to a new survey by the married dating site IllicitEncounters.com an alarming number of people are keeping schtum about their sexual desires, suggesting it could be fuelling an increase in infidelity as they fill their void elsewhere.

The website polled 2,500 of its members asking if they have sexual fantasies they haven’t revealed to their partner. The results showed a staggering 86% of people are keeping their sexual kinks under lock and key, unwilling to share their deepest desires.

Those who admitted to keeping sexual secrets were then asked to reveal what needs aren’t being met at home. BDSM dominated the list of secret sexual fantasies, tying up the competition and taking first place with 62% of the vote.

Half of members polled secretly fantasise about role play, suggesting that slipping into seductive characters and exploring taboo scenarios is too risqué to discuss with partners.

Fittingly in third place, threesomes are high on the list of secret sexual fantasies (47%). The allure of a steamy trio clearly captures the minds of many but few would reveal this to their other half.

A member of the married dating site, Jeff, said, “There’s so much I’d like to explore sexually with my wife but she’s really reserved. In fact, I don’t think we’ve ever really spoken about sex, let alone sexual fantasies. I know it’s something that’d make her feel uncomfortable, so I’d rather avoid rocking the boat.

Instead, I’ve decided to seek excitement and fulfilment elsewhere. I wouldn’t say it’s about being a cheater, I just want to fulfil my wilder desires and experience the adventure I’m missing at home before it’s too late.”

Carolina, another member of the website, said, “I’ve always struggled with opening up to my husband, so I just keep my sexual fantasies to myself, maybe because of fear he’ll judge me, or worse, laugh at me.

I suppose I’d always hoped he’d magically understand what I crave, which is why I’m now having my needs met outside of my marriage. Finding someone who I can be 100% honest with sexually has been so liberating – I just wish I’d found the site sooner!”

Expert comment from Jessica Leoni

Jessica Leoni, sex and relationships expert for IllicitEncounters.com commented, “Not everyone feels comfortable sharing their sexual fantasies, and that’s perfectly fine! Sometimes the fear of judgement or rejection is just too much to handle, and it’s difficult to fully suppress those kinky desires, so needing to find a way of meeting those fantasies elsewhere isn’t surprising.

However, the number of people who don’t feel comfortable enough to share those sexual fantasies with their partner is actually quite alarming, because having open communication about something like that can have a huge impact on intimacy within a relationship. Sharing your desires can create more opportunities for exploration, understanding and potentially discovering new shared interests.”

Results

Do you have sexual fantasies you haven’t revealed to your partner?

Yes 86%
No 14%
 

Which sexual fantasies are you hiding from your partner?

BDSM 62%
Role play 50%
Threesomes 43%
Filming yourself having sex 27%
Swinging 22%
Crossdressing 13%
Other 8%

Hear, Hear, Lawyers, Win the Sexiest Profession of the Year! 

The key findings

* Lawyers have been voted the sexiest profession in annual survey
* Doctors and CEO’s round off the top 3, followed by Builders and Firefighters
* Estate Agents rank last with only 2% of women finding them sexy
* Results come from a study conducted by IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s leading dating website for married people

IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s leading dating website for married people, surveyed 2000 women to discover which male profession is the sexiest in 2022. 

Expert comment from Jessica Leoni

Sex and relationships expert for IllicitEncounters.com, Jessica Leoni has compiled and commented on the results below:

Will the defendant please rise – the verdict is… guilty! Lawyers are the sexiest profession of the year. Accounting for a whopping 20% of the vote – women find men in the courtroom the sexiest of them all, case closed. 

What’s up Doc? We’ve run the diagnostics and the results confirm second sexiest profession are the men in white – Doctors – with 18% of the vote. 

CEO’s turn heads with 15% of the vote and in honourable third place.

Can he fix it? Yes, he can! Builders are hot property in fourth sexiest jobs with 12%. 

Turn up the heat!  Firefighters come in fifth sexiest (9.5%). On a primal level, a Firefighter is in every woman’s fantasy. The masculine physique, the muscle and sweat combined with raw unbridled passion… okay, a little carried away there, but what’s not to like?

Women think Footballers are fit, scoring sixth place (7%). It’s plain to see that fame and fortune help with sex appeal.

Teachers score seventh sexiest profession (5%), seems the ladies are up for a little bit of detention, naughty. 

On the less sexy scale are Financial Advisors with only 3% of the vote in eighth place. Economics? Boring. With everything getting more expensive and people are scrimping for cash – seems we’ve all had enough of talking about money. 

999, call the Police! Or don’t for that matter… we’d rather avoid a copper as only 2.5% of women find the five-o sexy. Cops have had a bad rep over the last few years in Britain, with overall confidence in the police dropping year on year since 2017, as reported by the ONS*, it’s clearly had an effect on their desirability. 

In last place with 2% of the vote, it seems Estate Agents are a bit of a turn-off. These notorious charmers often misinterpret the facts to get a quick sale, and with rent and house prices continuing to go up it’s no wonder we’re not the biggest fans of these smooth-talking salesmen. 

It’s not just ripped, topless men that make the cut, attraction is so much more than that. Sure the physical is important, but women want more than a hunk – and this list makes that fact indisputable.

Lawyers and Doctors coming out on top suggest it takes more than a beefcake to turn a woman on. Confidence, intelligence, philanthropy, and wealth – are more important qualities that make up a man’s sex appeal, and what men do for work speaks volumes.

Results

Sexiest Professions 2022

Lawyer 20%

Doctor 18%

CEO 15%

Builder 12%

Firefighter 9.5%

Footballer 7%

Teacher 5%

Financial Advisor 3%

Policeman 2.5%

Estate Agent 2%

Other 6%

About the research

NOTES TO EDITOR
IllicitEncounters.com is the UK’s leading dating website for married people and the leading authority on infidelity. With over 1,000,000 genuine UK users since 2004, you’re sure to find your perfect match.

Established in 2004, we have been providing a meeting place for like-minded married and attached people for nearly 12 years. Our members have one thing in common – they are all looking for a little romance outside their current relationship. Whether that’s the occasional bit of flirtatious chat, a regular coffee date, or a full-blown affair, that’s up to them.

We’re always more than happy to talk about IllicitEncounters.com – please contact Christian Grant through the details below – but we’re not willing to speak publicly about SaraHartley.net at this moment in time.

Email: presspr@illicitencounters.co.uk
 

Mobile: 07824 353986

Twitter: @cheatsafer

Spicy New Year Bucket List

The key findings

* Hotel sex is the number one sexual adventure we’d like to try in 2022

* Phone sex is the least desirable fantasy for both men and women

* Men say yes to sex in public, no to bondage

* Women say no to threesomes, but yes to foreplay

* Survey conducted by IllicitEncounters.com the UK’s largest extra-marital dating site

We’ve heard it all before – lose weight, save more, drink less – it’s the same old resolutions every year.

Rather than focus on the obvious, IllicitEncounters.com put the vote to 1000 of its users with a slightly different kind of poll – what sexy bedroom adventures would they most like to explore in 2022.

500 men and 500 women were questioned on whether they would like to try out any of the following sex-capades in 2022 and here are the results.

The top sexual adventure for men and women to explore in the bedroom is hotel sex, in first place for men with 95%, and second place for women with 81%. A combined total of 88% makes it the top adventure to tick off people’s bucket lists in the upcoming year. 

Close second adventure for men is sex in public with 89% of the vote.

The top sexual adventure for women to explore in the bedroom is foreplay (97%).

Men (28%) and women (17%) would least like to try out phone sex, a stark contrast to a poll conducted pre-pandemic when phone sex was the top sexual fantasy for both men and women (80.5% favoured this bucket list fantasy in January 2020). Perhaps we’ve all had enough of virtual sex over the course of covid and lockdowns. 

Spicy New Year Bucket List

Hotel Sex

Men – 95% said yes

Women – 81% said yes

Booking a hotel to have some romantic adventures with your significant other is the best way to enjoy some one-on-one adult fun. Spending the night getting hot and sweaty in freshly laundered sheets and then ordering room service? It doesn’t get much better than that.

Sex in Public

Men – 89% said yes

Women – 37% said yes

Usually explored in the honeymoon period of a relationship when you simply cannot keep your hands off each other. It’s naughty and risque, not to mention subject to nudity and decency laws – not one for the fainthearted! My recommendation is to find somewhere isolated and discreet for those wanting to try sex in public for the very first time, before you join the expert level mile high club.

Threesome

Men – 88% said yes

Women – 18% said yes

Some may say that three is in fact – the magic number. Inviting a third person into the party can be exhilarating, fun, and full of discoveries. Make sure that you have some boundaries and rules laid out with your partner before giving this one a shot, and if everybody is game, this bucket list must-have guarantees a night of racy fun.

Dress up and Striptease

Men – 86% said yes

Women – 77% said yes

The Full Monty? Yes, please. Dressing up and performing a striptease is going to get anybody’s pulses racing. Invest in some erotic clothing or lingerie and step outside of your comfort zone – not only does playing dress up build your confidence, it’s a sure way to turn your partner on.

Sex in Shower

Men – 80% said yes

Women – 68% said yes

Getting down and dirty while you’re soaking wet is undeniably sexy. Shower sex can be very sensual. Soaping eachother up and touching slippery wet bodies – it’s a fantasy many of us want to fulfill! One word of advice – it’s an idea to invest in a nonslip matt to avoid any accidents,

Foreplay

Men – 79% said yes

Women – 97% said yes

None of this wham, bam, thank you, mam. Foreplay is essential for good sex! Spending more time playing beforehand and getting each other aroused creates anticipation and sexual energy that is bound to make the act of lovemaking a whole lot more satisfying.

Role-play

Men – 60% said yes

Women – 40% said yes

Getting involved in role-play is the ultimate way to express yourself in the bedroom and acting out any adventurous sexual fantasies you may have. Decide on a scenario and roles prior. Play dress-up to make the experience more authentic, think doctors and nurses, coppers and robbers – whatever tickles your fancy.

New Sex Positions

Men – 40% said yes

Women – 65% said yes

Kama Sutra – why not? If you always rely on missionary, mixing it up a little will add so much more to your sex life. It can be very rewarding trying out new stuff – there are some pretty wild positions out there worth giving a shot, that can really bring couples closer together. 

Bondage

Men – 34% said yes

Women – 74% said yes

A great way to explore your kinkier side. It’ll get you communicating better in the bedroom and discovering all sorts of thrilling things you may have not even realised you were into. Rihanna got it right in her S&M track – “sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me.”

Phone sex

Men – 28% said yes

Women – 17% said yes

Nothing beats this old time classic. Imagine a long night ahead of you apart from your lover, what better way to close the distance than a naughty call? Dirty talk is an art, and a timeless sexy adventure. Now you can turn up the heat by switching on the camera too, to add that extra dimension to this fantasy.

Expert comment from Jessica Leoni

IllicitEncounters.com sex and relationship expert Jessica Leoni said “A new year signifies new opportunities and why shouldn’t that extend to our bedroom fantasies. Whether you’re in a stale relationship that needs some extra spice, or single and ready to mingle – giving the sexy New Year bucket list a try this year is a must!”

About the research

NOTES TO EDITOR
IllicitEncounters.com is the UK’s leading dating website for married people and the leading authority on infidelity. With over 1,000,000 genuine UK users since 2004, you’re sure to find your perfect match.

Established in 2004, we have been providing a meeting place for like-minded married and attached people for nearly 12 years. Our members have one thing in common – they are all looking for a little romance outside their current relationship. Whether that’s the occasional bit of flirtatious chat, a regular coffee date, or a full-blown affair, that’s up to them.

We’re always more than happy to talk about IllicitEncounters.com – please contact Christian Grant through the details below – but we’re not willing to speak publicly about SaraHartley.net at this moment in time.
 

Email: presspr@illicitencounters.co.uk
 

Mobile: 07824 353986
 

Twitter: @cheatsafer

Doctors and Bartenders are Hot, Coppers are Not – Sexiest Professions Revealed!

The key findings

* Doctors have been voted the sexiest profession in annual survey

* Bartenders and CEOs rounded off the top 3, followed by footballers and firemen

* Sexy policeman fantasy quashed, as policemen receive a mere 1% of the vote

* Government officials rank second to last with only 3% of women finding them sexy

* Results come from a study conducted by IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s leading dating website for married people 

A doctor, a CEO and a football player walk into a bar, aren’t you spoiled for choice.

IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s leading dating website for married people, surveyed 2000 women to discover which male profession is the sexiest in 2021. 

Expert comment from Jessica Leoni

Sex and relationships expert for IllicitEncounters.com, Jessica Leoni has compiled and commented on the results below:

Doctors scrub up well with nearly a quarter (24%) of women voting this profession as the sexiest of all. 

Those who enter the field of medicine tend to be compassionate, skilled and very clever – qualities that women find attractive in a man. Add to that an earning potential of five times the average salary – hard to resist. No doubt doctors have won the hearts of many in the last year with how well they have handled the challenges of Covid-19.

Bartenders, who prescribe a very different kind of tonic, sent pulses racing with 19% of the vote. You might be spilling more than a drink at the bar with lonely patrons spilling their hearts out, bartenders are often free therapy for those in need. Good looks and a listening ear are a recipe for attraction. The masses have largely missed the public house bartender with all the lockdown restrictions – so it’s great to see them come in second sexiest overall. 

CEO’s take third place with 15% of the vote, suggesting business men are quite the catch.

Fame and fortune fares well with footballers scoring a handsome 9%, and 4th overal sexiest profession. Football has caused quite a stir recently with the controversial European Super League, though evidently this has not dampened a footballers sex appeal. 

The fireman fantasy is well and truly alive, in fifth place, as 8% of women have the hots for a sexy firefighter.

Teachers come in 6th place (6%), followed by builders in 7th place (5%).

Suprisingly personal trainers score low in the list, coming in 8th place with only 4% of women voting this profession as sexy. Perhaps women feel intimidated by the excessive fitness that comes with a chisled physique.

Government officials rank second to last in 9th place with only 3% of the vote. Suggesting politics is not that sexy afteral.

Contrary to popular belief, policemen are not that desirable, coming in 10th and last place with a mere 1% of the vote. With overall confidence in the police dropping year on year since 2017, as reported by the ONS*, it appears less women find this particular man in uniform appealing. 

Results

Sexiest Professions 2021

Doctor 24%

Bartender 19%

CEO 15%

Footballer 9%

Fireman 8%

Other 6%

Teacher 6%

Builder 5%

Personal trainer 4%

Government official 3%

Policeman 1%
 

*https://www.ethnicity-facts-figures.service.gov.uk/crime-justice-and-the-law/policing/confidence-in-the-local-police/latest#full-page-history
 

NOTES TO EDITOR
IllicitEncounters.com is the UK’s leading dating website for married people and the leading authority on infidelity. With over 1,000,000 genuine UK users since 2004, you’re sure to find your perfect match.

Established in 2004, we have been providing a meeting place for like-minded married and attached people for nearly 12 years. Our members have one thing in common – they are all looking for a little romance outside their current relationship. Whether that’s the occasional bit of flirtatious chat, a regular coffee date, or a full-blown affair, that’s up to them.

Check out what our users are saying to each other in our live Lockdown Forum: www.illicitencounters.com/lockdown/pr
Username: pr
Password: openthel0ck4me

About the research

We’re always more than happy to talk about IllicitEncounters.com – please contact Christian Grant through the details below – but we’re not willing to speak publicly about SaraHartley.net at this moment in time.

Email: presspr@illicitencounters.co.uk

Mobile: 07824 353986

Twitter: @cheatsafer

How to keep the spark alive in lockdown

What the numbers show

* Dirty talk is the best way to keep the spark alive when apart

* Women prioritise honest communication about your feelings

* More men agree not being needy is the key to long lasting passion 

* The results come from a survey of over 1,200 members from IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s leading dating website for married people 

Is there distance between you and your sexual partner? How will you keep your sex life alive?

IllicitEncounters.com surveyed 1200 of its members and found out their top favorite ways to make long distance love, as well as some useful advice.

The top two favorite ways to keep the spark alive as voted by men and women is dirty talk and sexy pictures, interestingly enough the majority of women prefer dirty talk, whereas men opted for visual stiumulation with more voting for sexy pictures. 

Twice as many women as men prefer honest communication about your feelings.

Just over a quarter more men preferred video calls compared to women.

More men than women (17%) preferred their lover to not be needy when apart.

8 Most Popular Ways to Keep the Spark Alive

Dirty Talk
Samantha, Leeds

“There is literally nothing sexier than a man that knows how to talk dirty. It’s all about using your imagination, setting the scene and being descriptive. I recommend one of you being dominant on the phone, or perhaps take it in turns to be the one in control. To start, talk about what you’d like to do to one another, then move onto sexual requests and fantasies. Put on a husky voice and keep the tone slow and sensual, and if in doubt a little moan and a groan will also go a long way.”
Sexy pictures
Rebecca, London

“I get more gratification from sending dirty photos than from receiving them. You get a real kick out of it, feeling sexy and desirable. You want to dress up – seductive lingerie, stockings, push up bra, high heels – the works. Another handy tip is devil red lipstick and big volumized hair, attention to detail is paramount. Once dolled up you just need to set a timer for your picture. Make sure you’re happy with the background, facial expression, and get ready to pose. One of my top tips is to leave a little to the imagination as well, you want to aim to tease your fella. Sending naughty photos is such a turn on, and truly boosts your confidence. Having a man lust over you really makes you feel a million dollars.”

Video Calls
Trevor, Surrey

“It’s an opportunity to connect and be present. We are actually very lucky that we can do that these days. Firstly, find the time to make the call when you’re going to be alone and not going to be distracted. Secondly, ensure that you’re happy with the image,  you have a good angle and your background isn’t cluttered. Thirdly, relax, catch up and have a little flirt. You may feel a little camera shy at first, but you’ll be a pro at it in no time.”

Sexting 
Claire, Essex

“Sexy messages when apart are such a turn on, making you blush and giggle out loud. Take your time creating your message there’s no rush. I find what works for me is closing my eyes and imagining what I’d like to be doing with that person. Be descriptive, and use language you might be too shy to normally use in bed. For example, calling someone a naughty boy or a naughty girl is super cringy to say out loud, but for some reason totally hot via text. Let your imagination run wild” 

Honest communication about your feelings
Harriet, London

“Open and honest communication is one of the ground rules to any companionship, and even more so when you’re apart. In order to feel connected there has to be openness and a non-judgemental space in which you are able to talk. If I ever feel caught up in my feelings or insecure I always make the effort to discuss these things, so that I know that we’re on the same page. Problems arise when you keep eachother out of the loop. How can you possibly come up with solutions or compromise when feelings are kept hidden?”

Don’t be needy 
Michael, Devon

“Avoid speaking to each other everyday. Let’s not discuss our daily routine, why does anybody want to know about what time you woke up or what you had for breakfast? It’s boring. Let there be a little distance. All great love stories are ones where the lovers are tragically separated – these are tales of inspiration, desperation and eternal longing, it’s the separation that makes it so exciting. I’m not saying don’t talk at all! But don’t just call for no reason or to pass the time. Keep things fresh and exciting, chat a little less often.”

Set goals
Lewis, Manchester

“Having a goal gives you something to look forward to, and discussing plans to meet up with your lover creates anticipation, which is an excellent way to keep the spark alive. Talking about where you’d like to go, and what you’d like to do together when you finally can, makes being apart feel more temporary, and ignites your hopes and dreams about reuniting”

Sending gifts
Stephanie, Newcastle

“My love language is gifts, it always has been. I think if someone adores you they make the effort to surprise you with thoughtful presents. If I mention a perfume I really like, I expect my lover to buy it for me, I’d be offended if they didn’t. When apart I think it’s a good idea to send flowers, presents, anything to remind you that you’re being thought of”

Expert comment from Jessica Leoni

IllicitEncounters.com sex and relationships expert Jessica Leoni said “They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, they missed out the part that distance makes people horny.

Of course if you have a passionate relationship with someone, and all of a sudden you are not able to see them for awhile, it’s going to make you crazy with lust, and crave that person. Wanting to be physical with someone can sometimes be more powerful than the act itself.”

About the research

NOTES TO EDITOR
IllicitEncounters.com is the UK’s leading dating website for married people and the leading authority on infidelity. With over 1,000,000 genuine UK users since 2004, you’re sure to find your perfect match.

Established in 2004, we have been providing a meeting place for like-minded married and attached people for nearly 12 years. Our members have one thing in common – they are all looking for a little romance outside their current relationship. Whether that’s the occasional bit of flirtatious chat, a regular coffee date, or a full-blown affair, that’s up to them.

We’re always more than happy to talk about IllicitEncounters.com – please contact Christian Grant through the details below – but we’re not willing to speak publicly about SaraHartley.net at this moment in time.

Email: presspr@illicitencounters.co.uk

Mobile: 07824 353986

Twitter: @cheatsafer

Saucy New Year Bucket List

What the numbers show

* Phone sex is the number one sexual adventure we’d like to try in 2020
* Men say yes to sex in public, no to role-play
* Women say no to threesomes, but yes to foreplay
* Survey conducted by IllicitEncounters.com the UK’s largest extra-marital dating site

We’ve heard it all before – lose weight, save more, drink less – it’s the same old resolutions every year.

Rather than focus on the obvious, IllicitEncounters.com put the vote to 800 of it’s users with a slightly different kind of poll – what sexy bedroom adventures would they most like to explore in 2020.

400 men and 400 women were questioned on whether they would like to try out any of the following sex adventures in 2020 and here are the results.

Top sexual adventure for men to explore in the bedroom is sex in public 90%, a stark contrast to women, of which only 34% were interested in ticking this adventure off their bucket list. Close second adventure for men is hotel sex with 88% of the vote.

Top sexual adventure for women to explore in the bedroom is foreplay 92%, followed by phone sex 82%

Men would least like to try out role play 32% and women would least like to engage in a threesome 24%

Phone sex is the top sexual fantasy for men and women combined with 80.5% of men and women wanting to try phone sex in 2020.

Sexy New Year Bucket List

Sex in Public
Men – 90% said yes
Women – 34% said yes

Usually explored in the honeymoon period of a relationship when you simply cannot keep your hands off each other. It’s naughty and dangerous, not to mention subject to nudity and decency laws – not one for the fainthearted! My recommendation is to find somewhere isolated and discrete for those wanting to try sex in public for the very first time, before you join the expert level mile high club.

Role-play
Men – 32% said yes
Women – 41% said yes

Getting involved in role-play is the ultimate way to express yourself in the bedroom and acting out any adventurous sexual fantasies you may have. Decide on a scenario and roles prior and play dress up to make the experience more authentic, think doctors and nurses, coppers and robbers – whatever tickles your fancy.

Bondage
Men – 55% said yes
Women – 37% said yes

A great way to explore your kinkier side. It’ll get you communicating better in the bedroom and discovering all sorts of thrilling things you may have not even realised you were into. Rihanna got it right in her S&M track – “sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me.”

Phone sex
Men – 79% said yes
Women – 82% said yes

Nothing beats this old time classic. Imagine a long night ahead of you apart from your lover, what better way to close the distance then a naughty call? Dirty talk is an art, and a timeless sexy adventure. Now you can turn up the heat by switching on the camera too, to add that extra dimension to this fantasy.

Hotel Sex
Men – 88% said yes
Women – 70% said yes

Everybody loves a bit of off-duty fun, and booking a hotel to have some romantic adventures with your significant other is the best way to enjoy some one on one adult fun. Picture this, booking a room by the hour and texting your partner, “I’m waiting for you in Room 609 baby…hurry” – undeniably sexy.

New Sex Positions
Men – 84% said yes
Women – 71% said yes

Kama Sutra – why not? If you always rely on missionary, mixing it up a little will add so much more to your sex life.

Threesome
Men – 65% said yes
Women – 24% said yes

Some may say that three is in fact – the magic number. Inviting a third person into the party can be exhilarating, fun, and full of discoveries. Make sure that you have some boundaries and rules laid out with your partner before giving this one a shot, and if everybody is game this bucket list must have guarantees a night of racy fun.

Foreplay
Men – 68% said yes
Women – 92% said yes

None of this wham, bam, thank you mam – foreplay is essential for good sex! Spending more time playing before hand and getting each other aroused creates anticipation and sexual energy that is bound to make the act of love making a whole lot more satisfying.

Dress up & Strip off
Men – 74% said yes
Women – 68% said yes

The Full Monty? Yes please. Dressing up and performing a strip tease is going to get anybody’s pulses racing. Invest in some erotic clothing or lingerie and step outside of your comfort zone – not only does playing dress up build your confidence, it’s a sure way to turn your partner on.

IllicitEncounters.com sex and relationship expert Jessica Leoni said “A new year signifies new opportunities and why shouldn’t that extend to our bedroom fantasies. Whether you’re in a stale relationship that needs some spice, or single and ready to mingle – giving the sexy New Year bucket list a try this year is a must!”

 

NOTES TO EDITOR
IllicitEncounters.com is the UK’s leading dating website for married people and the leading authority on infidelity. With over 1,000,000 genuine UK users since 2004, you’re sure to find your perfect match.

Established in 2004, we have been providing a meeting place for like-minded married and attached people for nearly 12 years. Our members have one thing in common – they are all looking for a little romance outside their current relationship. Whether that’s the occasional bit of flirtatious chat, a regular coffee date, or a full-blown affair, that’s up to them.

We’re always more than happy to talk about IllicitEncounters.com – please contact Christian Grant through the details below – but we’re not willing to speak publicly about SaraHartley.net at this moment in time.

Email: presspr@illicitencounters.co.uk

Mobile: 07824 353986

Twitter: @cheatsafer

Britain’s top ten sex fantasies are revealed

* Results are from a new survey of 2,000 people by IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s leading dating site for married people

What the numbers show

More than half of women have fantasized about having sex with an ex-boyfriend while making love with their current partner, according to a new survey.

The encounter women are most likely to revisit in their head is sex with their first love, with 38% saying they have done this.

Less than quarter of women (24%) feel guilty about these reminisces – with the majority (76%) seeing it as part of life.

Slightly fewer men have sex with the ex in their heads.

Half of men (53%) have fantasized about past sexual encounters while having sex with their partner.

The first love was the most common sexual fantasy, chosen by 23% of men, and only 16% of men felt guilty about their behaviour.

The results come from a new survey of 2,000 people split evenly amongst men and women by IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s leading website for married people.

It looked at the top ten fantasies which people have when they are having sex with their current partners.

Women reminiscing about sex with a former partner was by far the most popular fantasy, with 57% saying they have done this.

The second most popular fantasy for both women and men was recalling a sex scene they have watched on TV or online, chosen by 40% of respondents.

In third place was sex with a celebrity, chosen by 38% of respondents – slightly more popular with women (40%) than men (36%).

The fourth most popular fantasy was a previous sexual encounter with their current partner – with 36% men and women regularly revisiting a particularly passionate former act of love-making.

Sex with a stranger came in fifth place on 29% – more popular with men (31%) than women (27%).

A sexual encounter with a work colleague was the sixth most popular fantasy – chosen with 27% of men and women.

Sex with a friend came seventh with 25%  – more popular with women (27%) than men (23%).

Group sex was the eighth most popular fantasy with a score of 19%  – chosen by far more men (25%) than women (13%).

In ninth place was sex in a public place, chosen by 14% of respondents, and sex with someone in authority such as a police officer or traffic warden came tenth (11%).

Expert comment from Jessica Leoni

IllicitEncounters.com spokesman Christian Grant said: “What this new sex fantasy research shows is that the grass really is greener for a lot of couples who like to reminisce with fondness about past sexual encounters even when they are having sex with their current lovers.

“Sex has become routine for far too many couples and they are choosing to spice things up by starting an affair not just in their fantasies but in reality, too.

“They are hooking up with former lovers on social media sites such as Facebook and using dating sites such as IllicitEncounters.com to meet like-minded people for discreet affairs.”

More than one million people have registered with IllicitEncounters.com since the site was started more than ten years ago.It is enjoying a bumper start to 2019 with registrations up 25% in the first six weeks, as increasing numbers of unhappy spouses act on their New Year’s Resolution to shake up their relationship by starting an affair.

About the research

Britain’s top ten sexual fantasies revealed

  1. Sex with the ex – 55%
  2. A sex scene on TV or online – 40%
  3. Sex with a celebrity – 38%
  4. Sex with my current partner – 36%
  5. Sex with a stranger – 29%
  6. An affair with a work colleague – 27%
  7. Sex with a friend – 25%
  8. Group sex – 19%
  9. Sex in a public place – 14%
  10. Sex with someone in authority – police officer or traffic warden – 11%

NOTES TO EDITOR
Illicitencounters.com is the UK’s leading dating website for married people and the leading authority on infidelity. With over 1.2 million genuine UK users since 2004, you’re sure to find your perfect match.

Established in 2004, we have been providing a meeting place for like-minded married and attached people for nearly 15 years. Our members have one thing in common – they are all looking for a little romance outside their current relationship. Whether that’s the occasional bit of flirtatious chat, a regular coffee date, or a full-blown affair, that’s up to them.

We’re always more than happy to talk about IllicitEncounters.com – please contact Christian Grant through the details below – but we’re not willing to speak publicly about SaraHartley.net at this moment in time.

Email: presspr@illicitencounters.co.uk
Tel: 020 7729 6098
Twitter: @cheatsafer