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You say it best when you say ……

Nothing at all for some. For others, words make or break the loving feeling. What are some of the things that our lovers say that turns us on / off?

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Comments (53)

Funguy77 - 26 Aug, 2023 - 03:27PM

You know what’s funny . Everyone says the same things

We must have a conversation. I’m only here for fun . Must be honest.

Why can’t we be all these things in our real lives lol

Toffee.macchiato4 - 25 Aug, 2023 - 09:19PM

Hello fellow naughty people 🙂
So turn on. for me is when a lover says “please please please please “

Hahaha 🤣 I know it’s weird but there’s something irresistible about a lover pleading to do stuff to me . I can’t explain it I just melt and am potty in his hands. 🤷‍♀️

Turns offs well my biggest one is bad breath or BO
In terms of words, I don’t like it when a man cannot apologise when he has done wrong. I think the sign of true strength is when one can apologise when one has erred.
But then again wtf do I know 😁😁
Happy Friday all 😊

FluffyClouds - 24 Aug, 2023 - 03:47PM

Hmmm, only a certain type of men talk like that Abbie O

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AbbieO - 23 Aug, 2023 - 11:45PM

It was stimulating for me to get a rare glimpse into how guys talk about us when they get together.

That’s what I meant.

Anyone who thinks men don’t talk like that when they are together and realise one of them may be “in” Is nieve or kidding themselves.

Come on guys. Be honest.

I know and my gf’s discuss which guy we want / fancy. And what we are going to do about it.

All I meant was, hearing a little insight into the guys chat was interesting. And it was all complimentary.

Better that than have them say “I wouldn’t do her for a tenner” 😉

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Funguy77 - 23 Aug, 2023 - 04:15PM

@ Enigma.. - 23 Aug, 2023 - 04:00PM


Enigma.. - 23 Aug, 2023 - 04:00PM


You ought to hear we Scottish pronounce the word prick… lol 😂😉😏…

Game changer lol ❤️😉

truthwithinalie - 23 Aug, 2023 - 02:02PM

"There is something to that Rishi Sunak".....break

"I had this wonderful experience with..."...make

Naughty in NW - 23 Aug, 2023 - 01:47PM


Is that advice directed at all the ladies on here? Possibly including some men who get a kick out of wearing women's knickers.

Don't whip them off and swing them triumphantly in the air too soon. The best and most intense liaisons will originate from lustful, intelligent and witty messaging, assuming photos are appealing too.

That build up is amazing. Just my view of course. Each to their own and all that!

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ExoticOrchid - 23 Aug, 2023 - 01:45PM

I thought AbbieO was being sarcastic???

If she wasn't ... takes all kinds huh ... 🤦🏻‍♀️

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laugar164 - 23 Aug, 2023 - 01:34PM

Biggest turn on is the smile and the look in there eyes
The eyes are the gateway to the heart and how the lady is feeling

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Funguy77 - 23 Aug, 2023 - 12:13PM

How has that ever turned on anyone in history.

But each too our own right x

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Eliza Boo - 23 Aug, 2023 - 12:03PM

"Bet you a tenner I do her"

- would have been a hard slap or at least a drink in the face from me. Or might just have got off with his mate instead, just to rub his smug face in it. 🤷‍♀️

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Onekissmore - 23 Aug, 2023 - 11:16AM

Have you had many dates / any success on here .

I mean 😂🙈

Beckysharp - 23 Aug, 2023 - 10:47AM

I would not have found that flattering at all Abbie! I’m sure it was meant nicely though

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boav91 - 23 Aug, 2023 - 09:00AM

Abbie that is funny. I wonder if others that would make them run to the hills.

Reading the rest I think you have to really learn to love yourself first and not rely on this place to do that for you. It has the tendency to play to underlying insecurities if you allow it. You cannot confuse infatuation and initial intimacy with love. Whilst that can come later expected or not, if you are looking for that to self actualise you , you open yourself up to hurt when it fails as it also impacts on your sense of who you are. Love yourself first and what I tried to learn last time, still crap at taking my own advice, is dont try to hard. If you know your own worth, you are shielded a little.

I do have to say I love it when the woman in the conversation is flirty and lets that side of me come out. Sometimes with so little to go on it is hard to know the boundaries people expect.

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AbbieO - 23 Aug, 2023 - 05:50AM

I obviously like the usual stuff.
Guys telling me what i am and what I want and what I’m gonna get etc.

But the biggest turn on ever was a time I was flirting with a guy at a party. I went to powder my nose and on way back I could hear him taking bets from his mates
“I bet you a tenner I do her” etc.
OMG. So hot x

Paula99 - 22 Aug, 2023 - 06:26PM

Mark Watson affair …

That’s a bucket full of bollox if I have ever heard one ..talk about making excuses for his behaviour…😂

We are all here for different reasons but putting a label on it just makes him sound like a prick …🙄

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Juicyju1970 - 22 Aug, 2023 - 03:33PM

Get your knickers off 😉😘

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Dotty Green - 22 Aug, 2023 - 11:41AM

Sandypops - 22 Aug, 2023 - 02:55AM

OK, I mean at times we cannot control our feelings and they do spiral.

As others will tell you, I am one who will say go on lots of first meets, if nothing comes of it, it is a pleasant hour or so. You must not or should not feel any pressure to go further unless you feel comfortable.

I think I knew pretty early on when I found the one I wanted to take things further with, and yes there were meets that weren't great on both sides, but I am not one to just settle, we risk too much, so it needs to be right.

And Sandy you are NEVER second best remember that

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logicboy - 22 Aug, 2023 - 09:36AM

Turn on if she turns to me midway through the evening and, looking into my eyes smiling she sincerely says: "you are not special"

Explanation: for reference see article in the independent today about Mark Watson and why he had a 3-year long affair. There's plenty of heartache in how that played out and food for thought, but Mark's explanation of having an affair to avoid confronting the fact that he wasn't as successful as he wanted to be and that he wasn't special...

So why / how would saying this be a turn on to me? If you can understand or imagine why then your my type of person.

Funguy77 - 22 Aug, 2023 - 09:27AM

@ Sandypops - 22 Aug, 2023 - 02:55AM

See I get that a lot. Good chat for days some of Iv very hot and fun then just before the meet it’s silence 🤐
It must just be nerves.. sometimes I worry about myself being so relaxed about this . Have a nice meet arranged for Thursday let’s see if she turns up xx

Sandypops - 22 Aug, 2023 - 02:55AM

Dotty Green
I never started the affair looking for love. Well not the kind of love that snuck up on me. But I'm in a much better head space and just going with the flow. I've taken on board a lot of what you amazing ladies and gents have said and am enjoying being back chatting with men and arranging some first meets (which I'm doing on my terms, not to please them) we'll see how they go.

What I don't get is arranging a meet after chatting loads and then silence for a few days beforehand and them still thinking you'll meet up 🤦🏻‍♀️ ummm no, gotta keep the momentum going before a first meet. Your chat with me is archived 😂

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Enigma.. - 21 Aug, 2023 - 08:26PM

Actually meeting someone on here, for a date, is a bloomin miracle.

London is booming. Travel further North it’s like 🙄🥱🤔🤷🏼‍♀️.

Good luck @Sandypops x❤️

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Funandfrolicks45 - 21 Aug, 2023 - 05:03PM

For me a stolen secret moment together is very sexy,you shouldn't be there but you can't stop thinking about been there,and that text " I'm on the way to meet you" knowing fair well your going to cherish ever second and every inch of each other
Then back to reality:) hey ho, enjoy every moment you can get if it's that good as I won't last for ever that's for sure
Single and very ready to start again with the right person;)

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Dotty Green - 21 Aug, 2023 - 08:46AM

Sandypops - 21 Aug, 2023 - 02:06AM

Unfortunately, and I understand your feelings, you are going into an affair looking for love and sadly you will get hurt.

Everyone has fallen in love with an affair, in their mind this person is their perfect escape. Sadly one of us seems to always have more feelings so one will be hurt when it ends. They always end.

I’m slightly older than you and my outlook changed after being hurt. I see my affairs for what they are a wonderful decadent escape. I enjoy the ride whilst it lasts - and while of course there are feelings I never let myself consider it’s love or this is the man of my dreams. My real life comes first end of.

Just be careful of being hurt and used - sometimes hold back - if the person is interested they will pursue and NEVER be the back up !!!!

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Bobby224 - 21 Aug, 2023 - 06:34AM


To leave such hurt must mean on the flip side that you had a wonderful experience and that’s what you should be focusing on. Also we know what we are doing and putting ourselves out there for potential hurt, we know what we signed up for, so in my eyes it’s better we feel the hurt rather than our spouses. It’s a result if our spouses don’t find out and get hurt!

Shame you are not in the Somerset area I love your commitment to your relationships! Chin up someone like you will find more fun!

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Sandypops - 21 Aug, 2023 - 02:06AM

Again, you all have some great words of wisdom, so thanks

Except for you 'not so smooth' operator 😂
I do love a Mills and Boon, shame life isn't like that, I'd be a very happy bunny if it was.
I've had affairs, flings, NSA and ONS before and not had any of the 'feelings' I felt this time. This guy was different and I don't know why. I suppose in the same way we've all thought we fell in love with the person we ended up marrying. We can't all compartmentalise and always think logically with our heads.
I'm 52 years old and have always worn my heart on my sleeve. But all the other times, those 'feelings' didn't materialise. Think I'm a bit long in the tooth to dramatically change now. I'm just me. Can't and won't pretend to be someone I'm not just to fit a box that 'people who have affairs' are meant to fit into.

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Eliza Boo - 20 Aug, 2023 - 06:50PM

Sandypops...why don't you want to disappoint anyone?! Its part of life and "no" can be delivered very reasonably if not quite nicely. Plus, how someone takes disappointment can tell you an awful lot about them. 'No' is an exciting risk - see what they will do. Will it be a toddler style meltdown (amusing if annoying) a drama lama 'flounce' (tiresome) or will they 'adult it' like a boss, come back to you on top form and totally impress you?!

Imagine they are naughty little ponies, Sandy, and practice the 'no'....delaying and denying makes those apples all the sweeter, should you decide to give them.

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Funguy77 - 20 Aug, 2023 - 03:34PM

Lol 😂

smooth operator - 20 Aug, 2023 - 03:19PM

What a load of sentimental tripe
Wise up and get with the moment
It’s 2023
Mills and Boon is just soooo past it
What next
Pen Pal dating

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Dotty Green - 20 Aug, 2023 - 02:47PM

Sandypops - 19 Aug, 2023 - 11:06PM

Stop being a people pleaser and be a YOU pleaser ….

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Funguy77 - 20 Aug, 2023 - 01:31PM

I feel for you sandypops xx

You know this forum tells you more about the people on here than most of there profile’s. All you lovely ladies who are posting have wonderful personality any I wish I lived closer to you all 😀 xx

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Beckysharp - 20 Aug, 2023 - 07:41AM

Just my experience Sandypops but it’s very difficult to feel enthusiastic about any man when you’re still lusting and pining after someone else… I’d just meet as many as possible until you feel flutters again. But it may take a while (so have fun during the process!)

To the OP I find the right words murmured at the right time in the right way can send electricity through me (in a good way 😂). So so powerful ⚡️

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TheBoredHousewife - 20 Aug, 2023 - 06:56AM

Sandypops - 19 Aug, 2023 - 11:06PM

It’s always painful when we come to the end of something that took our breath away. The heart pangs will in time give way to simply memories, and very good ones from the sounds of things. This IE malarkey has to be two-way though, and as much as you enjoyed him, there are now newer potentials on the horizon. Hopefully more suited to what you are looking for and need!

If either of these new men read the forum, they will know where you’re at with meets. I would personally meet both, then decide. Unless as you say, there is one very clear front runner and the others leave you cold.

Good luck with your meets - great to learn that there is good interest. Your womanly sense will tell you if someone fits what you are looking for. Please him, but only if it gives you pleasure to do so. 😊

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Paula99 - 20 Aug, 2023 - 06:29AM


If you’re trying to please everyone you won’t get anywhere…. you will learn over time to weed out the idiots ..Be clear on what you want …pen pal/ sext / long term/ short term …go on coffee dates …sound people out..don’t worry about how many you are chatting to because chances are they are stacking you up ..go with your gut feelings …it works for me 😁

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Sandypops - 19 Aug, 2023 - 11:06PM

My dilemma now is that I'm chatting to quite a few and they want to meet me and I don't want to disappoint anyone if they want to take things further. How do you know if a man you meet is the right one, or the next person you were going to meet would be the right one? Or do you meet them all and then decide unless the initial chemistry is overwhelming with one?
I'm definitely a 'people pleaser' as opposed to being tough and doing just what pleases me 🤦🏻‍♀️ so I'm feeling nervous.
I don't want to play games with anyone's feelings or anyone to perceive I'm playing games, as I'm not.

Sandypops - 19 Aug, 2023 - 11:01PM

Thanks for thinking of me 😘
I went and met him Friday, to talk. It was lovely to see him and we did more than we should have 🤦🏻‍♀️ but I'm ok-ish. I just needed to be held and kissed that 'one last time' (we didn't have sex) it was emotional but we also laughed and it felt so normal, as usual. Felt like a bit of a closure though it's still so painful thinking of him 😭
So I've decided to 'get back on the horse' (I own a riding school and am an instructor) and see what happens.
have some meets lined up (tomorrow and Monday) so I'm just going to see how I feel. The guy tomorrow has the same name 🤦🏻‍♀️
I'm learning as I go.

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TheBoredHousewife - 19 Aug, 2023 - 11:49AM

Sandypops - 19 Aug, 2023 - 01:11AM

How're you holding up?

Sandypops - 19 Aug, 2023 - 01:11AM

I need to add to mine
What turns me on ....

What Funguy77 wrote 😂

I and yes I know I need to toughen up and not be a soppy romantic on a married dating site 🤦🏻‍♀️

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Gentle Man Jim - 18 Aug, 2023 - 07:15PM

Some of the things a lover says that turn me off:
- is that it?
-was that it?
-do you have a glass I can put my teeth in?

Other than that I reckon I can cope with anything (other than uncontrolled laughter]

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Funguy77 - 18 Aug, 2023 - 06:54PM

Spoke too soon they just posted it lol 😂

Thank you and apologies for the authors of the posts I used to create xx

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TheBoredHousewife - 18 Aug, 2023 - 06:44PM

Dotty Green - 18 Aug, 2023 - 10:36AM

Nothing worse for me than being called a girl, even if my demeanour around him might be girlish. I would never call my man a boy. He is my beautiful, delicious man. This is a game for adults, not teenagers.

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Sandypops - 18 Aug, 2023 - 06:18PM

Turn ons
Good kissing (Not sloppy and shoving your tongue down my throat as far as you can)
Going on a date with no knickers on and telling the man when he can't do anything about it
Light touch on naked skin
Kissing my neck
Whispering what you're going to do to me
Playing with my feet (sorry feet phobes 😂
Did I mention kissing? 😊

Turn offs (in no particular order)
Wet, sloppy kissing and shoving your tongue down my throat as far as you can
Bad hygiene
Bad teeth/breath

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laugar164 - 18 Aug, 2023 - 04:06PM

You are with the wrong woman. If she has to take her nickers off 😈😉

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Funguy77 - 18 Aug, 2023 - 03:31PM

Part 3

Caught in a light rain shower, she brushed wet tendrils of hair from her face, the raindrops mirroring the tears of joy in her eyes. He gently wiped away a raindrop from her cheek, his touch an unspoken promise of protection and devotion.

In contrast, one evening, exhaustion overtook him, and he yawned with a chuckle. "I think I'm a bit sleepy today, baby," he confessed with a sheepish grin. They shared a laugh, knowing that even in moments of weariness, their connection remained unshakable.

Their love story was one of stolen glances, whispered promises, and shared dreams. A tale woven from the threads of ordinary moments, where love bloomed like wildflowers in unexpected places, turning the ordinary into the extraordinary, and forever intertwining their hearts.

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Funguy77 - 18 Aug, 2023 - 03:31PM

Part 2

As the evening unfolded, their conversation flowed effortlessly, and they discovered their shared appreciation for the art of kissing. "You know," he remarked softly, "kissing is truly a dance of souls, a symphony of connection. When done right, it's like two hearts speaking a language only they understand."

Nodding in agreement, she recalled moments when a single kiss had ignited a fire within her, while discussing how the subtlety of a touch could convey more than words ever could. It was in these discussions that their bond deepened further, each word a brushstroke on the canvas of their blossoming love story.

Days later, they found themselves walking hand in hand through a dense forest, the trees providing a natural curtain of privacy. Amongst the whispering leaves and dappled sunlight, they shared stolen moments of affection, their love as wild and untamed as the woods around them.

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Funguy77 - 18 Aug, 2023 - 03:30PM

Part 1

In a quaint restaurant bathed in soft candlelight, as the sweet aroma of dessert lingered in the air, he leaned in close to her ear. "Darling," he whispered with a mischievous smile, "would you accompany me to the ladies' powder room for a moment?"

Curiosity twinkled in her eyes as she nodded, intrigued by the request. Little did she know, he had a surprise planned that would deepen their connection. In the discreet privacy of the powder room, their gazes locked, and he gently peeled off her knickers, a tender act that spoke volumes of his affection. Returning to their table with her delicate knickers in hand, he presented them with a warm smile. "For you," he murmured, his eyes conveying a secret understanding that only they shared. She blushed, touched by his playful gesture, and the napkin before her was now imbued with a newfound intimacy.

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Funguy77 - 18 Aug, 2023 - 03:11PM

Some of throat like fifty shades lol ok my turn give me ten minutes to work out an original piece of work x

ritz667 - 18 Aug, 2023 - 01:15PM

Whisper to her before dessert in a restaurant to go to the ladies powder room, peel her knickers off, bring them back to the table and hand them to me for use as a napkin x

Perfect moments - 18 Aug, 2023 - 12:31PM

Kissing is a big turn on if it's done right.
Just shoving a tongue down someone's throat as if they trying to reach your tonsils is a big turn off.

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Acurious - 18 Aug, 2023 - 11:17AM

Turns me on: walk in the woods particularly when the trees are so dense that we could enjoy some intense moments together
When you are brushing you off wet hair having walked thru the light rains and there are some drops on ur face too.
Turn off : ahhh baby I think am a bit sleepy today 🤣

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Dotty Green - 18 Aug, 2023 - 10:36AM

Turn me on is... whispering in the lift ... I am going to f.... you senseless......... or just simply f... me

I think if someone tells me I was a good little girl or the such like - I might dry up

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logicboy - 18 Aug, 2023 - 10:14AM

For me it's not so much the words as the tone that either makes or breaks the loving feeling.

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