Comments (101)

Beckysharp - 23 Apr, 2024 - 05:42AM

There’s no secret- if you’re both enjoying it, it will last. If not- why bother!

ChocolateAubergine - 19 Apr, 2024 - 08:31PM

There are a lot of things that contribute but i think the strongest correlations to "long lasting" have probably been echoed by others in this thread.

Respect
Good communication
Protection
Trust

As others have pointed out, being mentally stable and sure of your needs is important, the temptation to keep looking is what often prevent potentially amazing experience from flourishing. Not all affairs start off with a bang! The longest affair i had was with a woman i was initially unsure about!

Sex is very easy to find, I think too many on this site now have spread themselves so thin that they can't commit to entertain anyone well enough. Sadly, nearly all of them end up being crap in bed and mentally unstimulating as they struggle to commit to the affair.

 6 members like this comment.

Life is a beach - 19 Apr, 2024 - 03:42PM

In my experience, the secrets of a long-term affair:

Take care of each other, be careful so that you protect each other and each other's families.

Good communication both ways will go a long way.

From what I have read in some of your comments, some people keep looking even if they have found someone. Those people will never find a fulfilling long-term relationship.

In my opinion, if you find someone who is attractive, intelligent, fun to be with, then stop looking, develop that relationship with that special someone. Be exclusive

Only then, you have a chance of having a great, long lasting relationship.

I am lucky enough to have found someone great,. It is going strong. It has been a few months and it is well on its way of being long term.

 3 members like this comment.

Dino100 - 19 Apr, 2024 - 11:47AM

Keep it secret !! Keep it fun, keep it exciting, keep it thrilling, keep it naughty, keep tge butterflies going and just because it's not your real life, respect each other and be kind xx

 2 members like this comment.

Robert24 - 18 Apr, 2024 - 11:19PM

I am just waiting to find out, being straight with each other must be a good start.

marklondonengland - 17 Apr, 2024 - 06:33PM

Tell him to think of England as you get started...

 1 member likes this comment.

Prof Sarah Beauchamp - 17 Apr, 2024 - 09:25AM

My long term affair finished due to something out of both our hands, very sad, but we finished on a nice note. We had fun, we laughed, we had lots in common and we made time for each other. We had ups and downs but talked through them. I never let him be more important than my real life. We had contact between meets, we had non sexual meets we even had nights away. We both loved our secret bubble. It would be nice to find that again but right now I am just ready for some fun and escapism and see what the future holds.

 3 members like this comment.

Pink Eiga - 16 Apr, 2024 - 05:25PM

Friends first. Both parties actually liking each other as people.
Having each other’s back re. Discretion. Accepting your IE’s boundaries.
Giving each other space.
And personally for me, a creative and varied sexual repertoire so things don’t get boring.

 7 members like this comment.

Amandi1712 - 16 Apr, 2024 - 03:56PM

Honesty, trust and discretion.
Sexual escapism and adventure.
Connection built on friendship and humour
Being and maintaining being fanciable, do not get in a rut.

 3 members like this comment.

Somniata - 14 Apr, 2024 - 04:40PM

Compatibility obviously. If you are compatible, you will go a long way. And you have to want a long term affair from the get go. Some people here are quite honest about the fact that they are looking for a short term arrangement, so they will not put in any effort to sustain the relationship.
Trust and honesty, as ironic as it seems in the circumstances, are very important. You need to be honest with each other in order to ensure your relationship is safe for both parties.

 4 members like this comment.