* 72% of cheaters say they never planned to stray – a single trigger tipped them over the edge

* Top reason? Feeling invisible at home – emotional neglect beats lack of sex

* 1 in 5 started an affair within just two weeks of their relationship’s breaking point

* Study conducted by IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s largest extramarital dating site

Silent treatment is driving Brits into the arms of someone else – with nearly three-quarters of cheaters saying a single event tipped them over the edge, according to a racy new poll.

The survey of 1,500 members of IllicitEncounters.com – the UK’s leading affairs site – found 72% of users never planned to cheat, but a single trigger pushed them into an affair.

Top of the list? Feeling invisible at home, with 48% saying emotional neglect was the final straw. One respondent said: “I could have set fire to my hair at the dinner table and my partner wouldn’t have noticed.”

Not far behind were those stuck in a sex rut – 44% admitted they hadn’t had a roll in the hay for months, while 39% said things went cold after the kids flew the nest, leaving them living with a stranger.

33% said their partner forgetting an anniversary pushed them over the edge, 28% caught their partner flirting on social media before deciding enough was enough, and a quarter of respondents said constant passive-aggressive jabs wore them down.

And once they hit that breaking point, 18% admitted they kicked off the affair within just two weeks – no messing about.

Jessica Leoni, sex and relationships expert at IllicitEncounters.com, said: “It’s not always about the steamy affair or wild lust – sometimes, it’s just about wanting to feel seen. When your partner forgets your anniversary or only speaks in sighs and sarcasm, it chips away at how valued you feel.”

She added: “Affairs don’t start with fireworks – they start with silence. And when home life feels like a cold shoulder, it’s no surprise people go looking for warmth elsewhere.”

Results
Most common affair triggers

“Felt invisible at home” – 48%
“Hadn’t had sex in months” – 44%
“Our kids left home and we became strangers” – 39%
“Partner forgot our anniversary” – 33%
“Caught them flirting on social media” – 28%
“Constant passive-aggressive comments” – 25%

* 32% of cheaters say their most recent affair never became physical.

* ‘Invisible affairs’ take place entirely online – making them ideal for people who aren’t necessarily looking for a physical connection but feel the need to be “seen, heard and desired”.

 * 78% of people having ‘invisible affairs’ say they turned to virtual relationships because of a lack of emotional connection at home.

* Study conducted by IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s largest extramarital dating site

A new type of affair is on the rise in 2025 – and it’s one you might never see coming.

According to a new survey of 1,600 married users on IllicitEncounters.com – the UK’s leading dating site for affairs – 32% say their most recent affair never actually became physical.

Dubbed ‘invisible affairs’, these relationships are defined by the complete absence of physical contact, yet they can still spark deep emotional and sexual connections. Unlike traditional infidelity, they leave behind no telltale signs – no lipstick-stained collars, no unexplained receipts, and no need for physical cover stories. For many, this is the exact appeal: discretion, safety, and emotional intimacy without the risk of being caught in the real world.

The ways in which people are conducting these affairs are varied, but all remain digital. The majority – 74% – said they maintain their virtual relationships through regular phone calls, while 65% admitted to exchanging flirty messages or sexting. Nearly half – 47% – send intimate photos and videos, and 26% have engaged in virtual sex via video calls.

So what’s behind the rise of invisible affairs? Emotional dissatisfaction seems to be the biggest driving force. A striking 78% of those engaged in these virtual relationships said they were seeking emotional support they felt was missing in their current relationship. 

Meanwhile, 67% reported feeling less guilt because there was no physical cheating involved, and 61% said they preferred this type of affair simply because it’s easier to hide. Another 43% admitted they were attracted to the thrill and excitement of digital intimacy, while 38% said they wanted to maintain physical loyalty to their spouse.

One anonymous member, a 42-year-old accountant from Surrey, described how her virtual relationship developed with a man she met on IllicitEncounters.com. “We’ve never met in person – but we talk every night. It started as innocent flirting, and it’s developed into one of the most emotionally intense relationships I’ve ever had. I’ve always felt invisible in my marriage and I increasingly got the sense that my husband just wasn’t interested in anything I had to say or how I felt. Keeping my affair online doesn’t feel like I’m cheating on my husband in the traditional sense, and I don’t think I’ll stop any time soon.”

Jessica Leoni, sex and relationships expert and spokesperson for IllicitEncounters.com, says the shift reflects how digital intimacy is redefining modern relationships. “Invisible affairs aren’t about avoiding connection – they’re about creating it in a new way,” she explains. “For many, these relationships offer a much-needed sense of being seen, heard, and desired, especially when that’s lacking at home.”

She adds: “They may not involve meeting in person, but the feelings involved can be just as powerful. These kinds of affairs highlight how modern infidelity is evolving – and how emotional needs often come before physical ones.”

Results

How are cheaters maintaining ‘invisible affairs’?

Phone calls 74%

Flirty messages/sexting 65%

Sending intimate photos/videos 47%

Virtual sex via video calls 26%

Why are people turning to ‘invisible affairs’?

Emotional unfulfillment in primary relationship 78%

Feel less guilty 67%

Thrill and excitement 61%

Want to maintain physical loyalty to partner 43%

* 41% of people having affairs say they’d consider signing a postnuptial agreement to protect themselves if their infidelity is discovered.
* 22% have already consulted a solicitor since beginning their affair — citing fear of divorce fallout, revenge, or loss of children’s inheritance.
* High-earning professionals like lawyers, surgeons, and tech entrepreneurs are leading the surge in postnups as strategic pre-divorce safeguards.
* Study conducted by IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s largest extramarital dating site.

A growing number of unfaithful Brits are quietly protecting their wealth in case their secrets come to light. 

According to a new poll of 2,500 married members by IllicitEncounters, the UK’s leading married dating site, 41% say they would consider signing a postnuptial agreement – not as a romantic gesture, but as a financial safeguard in case their affair is discovered.

Of those considering it, 22% revealed they’ve already consulted a solicitor since starting their affair, exploring how to ringfence their assets and avoid a costly divorce. 

The motivations behind the postnup boom are striking. The majority of those surveyed – 67% – say they want to protect their wealth from being divided up in court. Another 44% say their primary concern is securing their children’s inheritance, while 31% admit they’re bracing for revenge – expecting their spouse to retaliate financially if the affair comes to light.

Certain professions are leading the charge. Lawyers were the most likely to be exploring postnups, making up 19% of those considering the move. They were followed by consultants (16%), surgeons (14%), and tech entrepreneurs (12%) – all high-pressure, high-income roles where reputation and financial stability are often tightly intertwined.

Jessica Leoni, sex and relationships expert at IllicitEncounters, says the data points to a major shift in how modern affairs are playing out. “This isn’t just a legal trend – it’s a warning sign,” she said. “Affairs are no longer just emotional or sexual gambles. They’re strategic risks – and people are planning for the consequences before they even get caught. 

Postnups used to be rare, even taboo. But now they’re part of the cheater’s toolkit. Love may be unpredictable, but divorce can be expensive – and for many, protecting their wealth comes before protecting their marriage.”

One anonymous member put it bluntly: “If I get caught, I’ll lose my house and half my business. A postnup won’t protect my relationship – but it might just protect everything else.”

As extramarital relationships become more common among ambitious professionals, the rise in postnuptial agreements suggests that even betrayal now comes with a back-up plan.

* 71% of Brits say they would never fully forgive a partner for cheating.

* Only 12% believe a relationship can recover completely after infidelity.

* A drunken kiss is the most forgivable form of betrayal, with 89% saying they could overlook it.

* Poll conducted by IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s leading married dating site.

Can someone who cheats on their partner ever be trusted again? That’s the question at the heart of Netflix’s Cheat: Unfinished Business, which reunites eight ex-couples torn apart by infidelity to see if forgiveness – and even love – can be salvaged. But a new poll suggests the odds aren’t good.

A new poll involving 2,500 people (split evenly between men and women) by IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s leading married dating site, has revealed that 71% of its members would end their relationship immediately if their partner was unfaithful. 

Despite their own involvement in affairs, only 12% of respondents said they believed couples can “fully recover” from cheating once the trust has been broken. Interestingly, the poll found that men were slightly more open to reconciliation than women: 38% of male respondents said they had previously forgiven a cheating partner and stayed together, compared to just 17% of women.

When it came to what kind of cheating people might actually forgive, the results were striking. A drunken kiss was seen as the most forgivable form of betrayal, with 89% saying they could potentially overlook it. Sexting followed at 66%, while just over half (51%) saying they could move past a partner secretly using dating apps. 

More subtle betrayals – like “micro-cheating” (flirty messaging, liking provocative posts, or maintaining ambiguous friendships) – were forgivable for 39%. But forgiveness dropped off sharply when it came to physical or emotional intimacy: only 23% said they could get over a one-night stand, and just 17% said the same for emotional cheating. Full sexual intimacy saw forgiveness plummet to just 9%, while paying for sex was seen as the most unacceptable breach – with only 3% saying they could ever look past it.

The idea of revenge after betrayal proved to be a divisive topic, with one in four people (24%) admitting they would consider “cheating back” if they found out their partner had strayed. 

The results also show a generational divide: Gen Z were the most likely to forgive infidelity (39%), followed by Baby Boomers (25%), Gen X (19%) and Millennials (17%). 

Geography played a role too – the Welsh were revealed as the least forgiving nation (36%), while the Scots topped the charts for being open to giving cheaters another shot (55%).

Jessica Leoni, spokesperson for IllicitEncounters.com, said: “You might expect our members to be more open-minded about infidelity – but the opposite is true. What this poll shows is that even among people who stray, betrayal cuts deep. Trust is complex, and once broken, it’s rarely rebuilt. Netflix’s Cheat: Unfinished Business tackles exactly this issue – and our results show just how unlikely it is for couples to come back from that kind of rupture.”

Types of infidelity people are most likely to forgive:
Drunken kiss – 89%
Sexting – 66%
Secret use of dating apps – 51%
Micro-cheating – 39%
One-night-stand – 23%
Emotional cheating – 17%
Sexual intimacy – 9%
Paying for sex – 3%

Ages most likely to forgive infidelity
Gen Z – 39%
Baby Boomers – 25%
Gen X – 19%
Millennials – 17%

Country most likely to forgive infidelity
Scotland – 45%
England – 27%
Northern Ireland – 18%
Wales – 10%