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Is ADHD a good excuse?

My best friends husband cheated on her last month and he is using his recent ADHD diagnosis as the reason he played away. I don’t know what advice to give her. I think this is a cop out excuse and he’s using the diagnosis to get away with it and get her back but the more I read about it I am coming around to being on his side more. Can anyone offer any wisdom or their own experiences on this? Feels like ADHD is all we hear about these days and it is really to blame mistakes on it rather than someone behaving like a complete a**ehole!!! I want to give her the right advice but I’m torn… help.

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Comments (35)

Paula99 - 23 Sep, 2023 - 06:24AM


Considering that you have AS… this condition denotes the way you think and conduct yourself …plus you are engaging with’ marital philanderers’…clearly it makes you feel uncomfortable?
Do you want AS to become a reason to cheat ?

Ilneses are not to be used as a ‘label’ to cheat ?..you choose to do this because there is something lacking in your currant lifestyle not because you have a boil on your arse !!!😂😂😂😂

 2 members like this comment.

FluffyClouds - 22 Sep, 2023 - 07:46AM

Mipaulac -

Narcissists lack empathy and guilt. So no, they won't show any regard to other people. They're all about finding someone who will supply their needs. If someone can't supply, they discard without a second thought.

 2 members like this comment.

Eliza Boo - 21 Sep, 2023 - 10:56PM

Adhd, asd, odd...Why do we need an excuse?! Long term manogamy is an outdated concept. Spouses are family, eventually become like siblings. Sex and feelings of desire, being in love - it has to come from outside for a proportion of people. Keep the nest sacred and get those thrills elsewhere. I'm sure some people can combine the two together...nonidea hoe they do it though!

 1 member likes this comment.

mipaulac - 21 Sep, 2023 - 10:18PM

This post is a refreshing change from the continually recycled and censored chat.
It's asking a question that undoubtedly makes the married serial philanders very uncomfortable about the neuro and mental disposition that makes them continually cheat and deceive.
Of course there are all sorts of reasons and sad circumstances for having extramarital affairs but some come over as complete narcissists with no regard for anyone except themselves.

Paula99 - 21 Sep, 2023 - 09:04PM

DO7 …great post 😂

You cannot use illnesses as an excuse for your bad behaviour …end of 🙄

Doubleohseven - 21 Sep, 2023 - 12:32AM

It turns out that ADHD is a less powerful extenuating circumstance than a visit to the dentist. This is from today's news.
"He pulled away, apologised and left, according to the woman. The next day she reported the incident to Odey Asset Management’s then-chair, David Fletcher, who later gave her a typed file note recording the incident. The note said that, at the time of the assault, Odey had been under the influence of drugs he had taken during a dentist’s appointment.
(...) In Odey’s first admission of sexual misconduct against any of the 20 women who have made allegations against him, he told the FT: “The girl concerned did work for me in 2005 and I did grab her breasts and it was reported and investigated . . . I had just come back from having two hours [of] canal root fillings and was under heavy medication.” '

Anyone want to try this with their spouse?
"Yes honey, I am having an affair. It all started with a visit to my dentist..."

 1 member likes this comment.

Andrea Andrew - 19 Sep, 2023 - 05:57AM


I guess its very relaxing!

 1 member likes this comment.

1582640 - 18 Sep, 2023 - 11:11PM

I am borderline ADHD and do enjoy a lot of stimuli

 1 member likes this comment.

Pink Eiga - 17 Sep, 2023 - 10:22PM

laugar164 - 17 Sep, 2023 - 08:57PM

I’m sure we (both genders) have encountered logs at some point in our lives.

laugar164 - 17 Sep, 2023 - 08:57PM

Are you talking from experience (log in bed)

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