The L word....
What is your L word, is it Lust or Love? For me the affair and the
excitement is just pure unadulterated LUST, but how many of us here fall
prey and fall in love, do we cross a line when our lust turns to love....
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Comments (116)
Funguy77 - 15 Aug, 2023 - 05:10PM
For me at this moment in time my L word is Lost . But I I’m definitely one of those guys who dose like a connection to form and for me it makes the experience better that includes the hurt that comes. Iv not had meany in my life just three and one of them became my now wife and the last one ended about last month or so . But I’m looking forward to the spark that comes with the next one x
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Paula99 - 15 Aug, 2023 - 04:13PM
I am a little up in the air about the L word…
For hook up sites like this one I do think L is for Lust to some extent as the initial subject matter is the lack of sex /intimacy that is in the driving seat..
As your relationship starts to develop and the weeks become months then you do have some feelings..for guys they can put their emotions in a box but for women they can’t do sex without emotions ..as long as your partner understands this then so you can move on and learn to keep your emotions separate…
If you communicate with each other then you can set the boundaries….don’t let your heart rule your head.!!!
To say that I haven’t developed certain ‘feelings’ during my 2 long term affairs would be wrong but in the end your marriage/family must set the bar.. if you don’t pull the reigns early then your affair will be Lost( another L word)
You can emerge from this affair feeling that your lover becomes your friend and still keep things in order at home…the L word being like 🤗
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Funguy77 - 14 Aug, 2023 - 08:09PM
@ xoticOrchid - 14 Aug, 2023 - 05:37PM
And why not stranger thinks have happened right . 🤔
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ExoticOrchid - 14 Aug, 2023 - 05:37PM
Funguy77 - 13 Aug, 2023 - 09:53PM
I hardly think an adultery site is a place to go looking for "love" ...
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Eliza Boo - 14 Aug, 2023 - 02:52PM
It's true: the one in pole position never knows there are others on the bench. The subject won't risk suggesting the object is anything other than 'the one'.
Whereas, the one they percieve as their 'friend' or 'fwb' they discuss their 'stable' with, precisely because they don't have the romantic feelings for them. EVEN if the sex is amazing. It isn't really about sex Sandypops. I'd be interested to know what it was about this other one he valued more...
The more I see the more I think my gran was right - what people really wants is someone who withholds. God damn shame for all us horny devils though Sandy!
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Funguy77 - 13 Aug, 2023 - 09:53PM
@ sandypops
After reading your post snd other’s comments I thought of you . Please don’t give up on finding love ❤️
In a world of empty glances and distant hearts,
Two souls entwined, but worlds apart.
A loveless marriage, a fragile facade,
Where once-burning passion turned into a facade.
Promises whispered in the hush of night,
Now lost in shadows, out of sight.
Tangled in threads of unspoken pain,
Love's sweet melody replaced by a bitter refrain.
Yearning for connection, a touch that's true,
But love's flame has flickered, its warmth withdrew.
In the chambers of silence, they silently reside,
Bound by duty and fear, their hearts denied.
Yet amidst the ache, a glimmer remains,
A hope for redemption, to break love's chains.
For even in darkness, a spark may ignite,
And breathe life anew into the loveless night.
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Beckysharp - 13 Aug, 2023 - 08:40PM
Agree with all the comments so far.
Affairs are about us being selfish.
He told you that you were his second choice (if you were his first choice you would never have heard about the other one). So in future just ask yourself- is the sex and company with this man good enough to continue while it lasts, knowing that I am his second choice. If the answer is no, move on and be someone’s first choice (knowing that at some point you may get relegated, or you may do the relegating!)
I would add- they often don’t tell you they’re seeing others. But we can sense it, especially if they’re hot and cold about meeting. Or have a lot of excuses and ‘issues’.
Good luck Sandypops and enjoy your break 😘
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Eliza Boo - 13 Aug, 2023 - 07:35PM
Sandypops: This kind of thing really sticks in my graw. They say they don't want your food, but they still sit down at your table and eat it!
Beware the old 'I've always been truthful with you from the start' B.S. It means 'I'm telling you i'm going to disrespect you to make is seem like you've given your permission when i do." It makes them feel less like a turd as it legitimises their bad behaviour.
Someone is telling the truth if what they say is going to cause them to not get what they want ie: sex. So if a person alludes to the fact they want something else and will drop us when this thing they 'value' more comes along....they really do mean it.
It hurts being used as a place-saver and it's so hard to disattach. I know. Don't put the food on the table when they've said they will move on for desert. They mean it Xx
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