What do we really disclose?
Meeting a new person is always exciting. However most of us are meeting illicitly. What are your boundaries when disclosing personal details? Do we reveal our full names, places of work, give details about our family? What type of information are you willing to share? How much is too much?
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Comments (117)
Somniata - 15 Aug, 2025 - 08:44PM
I disclose very little personal information until the face to face meeting. From then on, if we are going to meet up regularly then I do expect to know more. I'm not comfortable being intimate with someone I know nothing about. I'm also very good at finding out information using the little details I pick up.
Amicus - 15 Aug, 2025 - 11:57AM
Personally , until I meet someone in person , anything I say, whilst always truthful is said in a way that would not identify me. Talking about real life is part of getting to know someone but exactly location , very descriptive work details and obviously name is a big no no until I actually know someone , even then…it can take a little time , and I would expect people to do exactly the same .
Always shocked when people use their face pics and profile pics with “married “ as a status , single I totally get but I see it as a massive red flag when people are far too forthcoming with personal details /identifiers
bright tack - 14 Aug, 2025 - 01:49PM
Er Well I have not gone as far as to meet anyone yet my own circumstances dictate any info I give is scanty until trust is built
SirrahNek - 13 Aug, 2025 - 10:31AM
What LadyDe said. I started referring to “Eldest”, “Youngest”, “My Wife” and being guarded about what I said or revealed - respect for my significant second as much as anything else. And she did the same.
But in post coital haze, we became less guarded. Which was awkward at first. And now feels natural.
We want to protect our affair. But we also want to protect each others “established” lives.
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LadyDe - 13 Aug, 2025 - 12:06AM
I think it takes time .. but equally if either of us don’t ask then why give out anymore information than you need to … my line of work means I have heard everything and shared nothing … but equally if you’re surely embarking on a long term affair then over time a lot spills out.. i actually prefer to use my kids and husbands name when chatting after a few meets, it just makes that easy rather than ‘oldest child said’ …’husband did’ … etc etc
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1798172 - 12 Aug, 2025 - 02:37PM
This is a real interesting subject, I think discretion is key and trust. There are so many scammers out there and just plain bored people who are quick to use your personal information against you. I think a nice slow approach to getting to know someone first is key..once that trust is built then anything goes...does anyone have a view on this?
Sophi1616 - 09 Aug, 2025 - 02:12PM
I’ve got a d**k pic catalogue that could rival Argos at Christmas!!!
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laugar164 - 09 Aug, 2025 - 09:23AM
Paula I forgot to say I bring the essential camera for bird watching only 😂
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laugar164 - 09 Aug, 2025 - 09:21AM
Paula 99 running to the hills shall I bring a tent or a hammock 😉
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