Comments (117)

tender_rock - 23 May, 2020 - 02:08PM

Doesn't matter if one is monogamous or poly, what matter is to be truthful to ourselves and to the partner about what our intentions are.

Everyone has their own goals and desires and expectations from the person in their lives and free to pursue it.

Have been monogamous and would like to keep it that way but don't mind if my IE is not however would expect her to be honest about it.

"Fornication depends on communication!"

 1 member likes this comment.

Pogosticks87 - 23 May, 2020 - 01:48PM

How men and women view things are normally different (not all). I think it depends on the person and their circumstances.

if you travel the length and breadth of the country on a weekly basis it would be silly of anyone to assume that you wouldn't be looking for others in different areas. Not all, but some would. The problem is honesty here.

I know the whole site is based in the premise of dishonesty and in a way it is a facade that we expect everyone on here to be honest however it makes things a whole lot easier if they are. If your circumstances allow you to have more than one I. E then you should be honest with all of them. It's up to them then if they want to continue with you.

Personally I stick with one, that suits my circumstances and my personality. I'm always honest and say this, if he doesn't agree I won't take it further. But I also won't scold him either. It's his choice.

Home life has to stay the same otherwise your just asking for trouble!

 3 members like this comment.

1357586 - 23 May, 2020 - 01:40PM

Can you cheat on an IE? Isn't an IE the cheat aspect ?

Depends on your reasons for being here. I do not want a serious, live in each other pockets relationship. If I did I wouldn't be here!

I just want the life I have with a few extras. No drama, I go to the theatre for that. No demands, work has that one sealed lol.

Just fun, friendship and frolics suits me completely

 5 members like this comment.

pkash78 - 23 May, 2020 - 01:00PM

I don’t believe that humans were naturally born monogamous.. that is just unnatural .
Marriage is a new institution added by civilisation and religion ..
our human emotions and natural needs and propagation of life cannot accept monogamy as the norm.. it is counter productive..
never heard of a bee that tastes only on flower. Our emotional well being relies on diversity and new relationships
Marriage as an institution invented by religion and civilisation is counterproductive
we can keep the marriage to complete the facade. To satisfy the religion / society / family / economy .

But our emotional well being as humans relies on diversity
We are naturally a social creature

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Songbird478 - 23 May, 2020 - 12:55PM

When does an IE become your IE? When you’ve chatted for X amount of days? When you’ve met? When you’ve had sex?
At the moment... it’s not possible to meet... do you put all your faith in one human behind a keyboard? Perhaps you need to kiss a few frogs to find YOUR IE?
Early on, I was convinced a guy I was talking to was going to be my IE he disappeared without a word. His right to do so and I have no idea of the circumstances behind that so I just have to shrug and deal with it. It wasn’t the first time or the last time! So when do you decide?
I am always open though... so it’s not a shock to anyone I’m chatting to.

 6 members like this comment.

pkash78 - 23 May, 2020 - 12:33PM

Regarding honesty.. I have.. but it seems to me people here are scared of telling the truth. or admitting the truth..

 3 members like this comment.

1272141 - 23 May, 2020 - 12:32PM

Because of the way these things work. Certainly for men, Its no different from buses. You wait and wait, then suddenly several appear.

The overall result is that no matter how many come, you can only finish the journey in one bus.

The chances are that, come a multiple set of prospective ie, following at least one real meeting; you get rejected by some, are undecided yourself in some cases, and one is likely to be the logical conclusion. More by her indication than your own. That is a fellas common default condition.

In some circumstances this might even involve a certain amount of sexual proving. As some go that far to avoid any uncertainty in the future. Again that can involve selection. But its not going to turn into a harem.

Ordinary relations with your spouse have to continue as normal.

 2 members like this comment.

Bugwithone - 23 May, 2020 - 12:22PM

Still waiting for my first!

But I only joined on Thursday! So I’m catching up with thevmessages that were sent to me!

I live in hope!

1334304 - 23 May, 2020 - 11:28AM

1) Yes
2) A few At first when I first joined and didn’t know what I was really looking for. (Not multiple though!)
3) Now yes, but at first I was more guarded and in self preservation mode.
4) No

 4 members like this comment.

1328828 - 23 May, 2020 - 10:57AM

I have been monogamous with my IE’s and expect the same in return. Obviously their relationship with their wife doesn’t count. I know I’m the ‘bit on the side’ but I would hope they don’t have a Ms Monday/Tuesday as well as me on a Wednesday plus the wife on the weekend for example.

If they are wanting to play the field with as many notches as possible then be upfront and say so. I know one lady on here would be more than happy with that form of reciprocal openness. It hardly makes me feel so great knowing it’s all just the same words used to all and there’s no real connection though. Personally I’m after a discreet traditional affair rather than just a shag!

 7 members like this comment.