Do we...?
Do we really know what we are looking for?
I only know when I have found it....
19 members like this.
Sorry, you can not comment on this.
Comments (376)
The Joy of Impotence - 25 May, 2023 - 06:12AM
Since being kicked in the head by a llama, I've been unable to engage in deep meaningful conversations. I suppose I have only myself to blame, though. Moral of the story? If a vet suggests you examine your llama to see if it's constipated, get them to do it.
CaptureMe - 08 May, 2023 - 10:57AM
Absolutely... you will know once you've found the right person ! Go with your gut and keep grounded!,
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 03 May, 2023 - 10:19PM
Douglas F…quote
This is escapism for me, fun and laughs etc, and not more deep meaningful conversations and emotional support...
At some point you may need to have a conversation and emotional support because you never know until you have been in IE relationships…and everyone has a different dynamic...so don’t knock it until you try it 🤔
2 members like this comment.
1596954 - 02 May, 2023 - 03:29PM
I know what I am not looking for and that is any more emotional baggage than I am already carrying around in my marriage. This is escapism for me, fun and laughs etc, and not more deep meaningful conversations and emotional support.
boav91 - 22 Apr, 2023 - 10:36PM
I thought I knew but it has not turned out as expected. Not connected fully yet so still working it out . Once I have figured it out promise to tell 😉
1 member likes this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 22 Apr, 2023 - 10:25PM
Max_master - 22 Apr, 2023 - 09:23PM
In my experience, absolutely changed us for good. Neither of us came to IE looking for the type of relationship it involved into.
2 members like this comment.
Cheesypuff - 22 Apr, 2023 - 09:44PM
Intoxicate Your Mind - 22 Apr, 2023
💤
6 members like this comment.
Max_master - 22 Apr, 2023 - 09:23PM
I do like the term happy clappers though. It is kinda positive no, even if not meant precisely that way?
On the topic - has anyone changed their perspective for good, after meeting an IE - male or female? And feel that it kind of changed them for good? Just looking at the positive of it, cuz the deceit, heartbreak, ghosting etc would be kind of par for such a platform … but people have seen significant positives come out of here?
Hedone - 22 Apr, 2023 - 06:01PM
Cheesy maybe words instead of one of emojis might be more grown up!
If that’s directed at me, direct away. At least I’m keeping it real and saying it how it is on here.
Fantasists everywhere
TheBoredHousewife - 22 Apr, 2023 - 05:04PM
Intoxicate Your Mind - 22 Apr, 2023 - 04:44PM
Cheerio! 😘
3 members like this comment.
Sandypops - 22 Apr, 2023 - 04:58PM
I think I know in my head what I'm looking for ... but I'm really trying not to overthink it and just go with the flow (thanks to everyone on here's advice)
Part of me thinks I may have found them, but only time will tell.
And to be honest, I'm generally just trying to enjoy the process 😉
Paula99 - 22 Apr, 2023 - 04:47PM
Congratulations Sexykate82 🤗
I am glad you have found your IE …
4 members like this comment.
Tall Gentleman 54 - 22 Apr, 2023 - 04:45PM
I think you know it is the right person when they add to your already busy like and you add to theirs.
For me it is about being respectful to the ladies wishes and desires.
4 members like this comment.
Hedone - 22 Apr, 2023 - 04:44PM
TBH
I’m not dictating anything,.
I don’t think you are actually getting what im trying to say, maybe that’s because you’re one of them
Happy clapping. I’ll leave it there
TheBoredHousewife - 22 Apr, 2023 - 04:40PM
Intoxicate Your Mind - 22 Apr, 2023 - 04:15PM
Of course I know what you mean, and I would never disagree that being honest to your IE partner is fundamental for a long lasting relationship. But we all know that people come on IE for a multitude of reasons. And those who have been in this game long enough know that an IE partnership ebbs and flows. Some partnerships work on the basis of exclusivity, others don’t. Some partnerships allow for the individuals to remain on the website, others don’t. We, as non involved outsiders, do not get to dictate how each partnership is run 😊
I think people are clever enough to suss out the BS in their own private chats anyway, and are capable of finding the right partners for themselves.
6 members like this comment.
Hedone - 22 Apr, 2023 - 04:15PM
TBH
I did actually say it was great news!
People just need to be honest on here don’t you think?
I don’t know about you love but I haven’t got the time or inclination to waste time on people who say one thing or pretend to be something they are not.
I am happy for anyone who finds what they are looking for but please this site is becoming full of happy clappers clapping at the BS, and you know what I mean by that 🤦🏻♀️
1 member likes this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 22 Apr, 2023 - 04:09PM
I think SexyKate82, and indeed anybody else on IE can do whatever they want. And whatever anybody gets up to is between them and their potential/confirmed IE.
Let’s be happy for those who say they have found a match. Life is too short to be caring about what others are doing 😉
8 members like this comment.
Hedone - 22 Apr, 2023 - 01:31PM
Katie
What?
Of course you can write that on your profile or something to that effect, come on!
1 member likes this comment.
1594837 - 22 Apr, 2023 - 01:24PM
Thought I had found it. Best chemistry I've ever had with someone. Seems to be slowly fizzling out 😔 on his end not mine. So back here again searching!
1 member likes this comment.
1594945 - 22 Apr, 2023 - 01:22PM
I’m not but can’t really put on there that I’m looking for anything else!
1 member likes this comment.
Hedone - 22 Apr, 2023 - 01:15PM
Katie
Why are you looking for male friendships when you’ve got an IE that you are 100 pc happy with?
1 member likes this comment.
1594945 - 22 Apr, 2023 - 12:48PM
And no he’s not here (aware that I still check the forums and he’s fine with that).
2 members like this comment.
1594945 - 22 Apr, 2023 - 12:47PM
Hi. I’m still here, and not that often, solely for the forums. You’ll see from my profile that it’s set to ‘friendship’.
1 member likes this comment.
Hedone - 22 Apr, 2023 - 12:13PM
SexyKatie
That’s great news and proves it can be found
Can I ask though why you are still here, if he is still here and again why?
2 members like this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 22 Apr, 2023 - 12:11PM
SexyKate82 - 22 Apr, 2023 - 11:47AM
Long may your liaisons last 😘
2 members like this comment.
Max_master - 22 Apr, 2023 - 11:51AM
More luck to you both Kate … and here’s to hoping that more of us find that chemistry :-)
2 members like this comment.
1594945 - 22 Apr, 2023 - 11:47AM
I wasn’t to sure what I was looking for! But have ended up finding a hugely strong connection with a lovely bloke, started by a few weeks of messaging and calls, followed by a meet for lunch and the connection was instant. Not one to judge and hope others aren’t either but we ended up in bed on that first meet. It’s been six months now and we probably manage to see each other twice a month with messaging and calls in between.
4 members like this comment.
Max_master - 22 Apr, 2023 - 09:13AM
I think you feel you know what you want, till someone just walks in and completely changes that perception and shows you the other possibility/ies and in the process add to you or take from you. Be careful of the later - but I have seen it happen, up close and personal
1 member likes this comment.
1586116 - 18 Mar, 2023 - 01:35AM
I think people think they know what they’re looking for but it isn’t until you find it that your truly know.
1 member likes this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 13 Mar, 2023 - 09:04PM
Peaches1 - 12 Mar, 2023 - 10:56PM
Hope things are going well with you these days 😊
1 member likes this comment.
Peaches1 - 12 Mar, 2023 - 10:56PM
Err....absolutely and I'm in no rush but I know who he is when he finds me. I'm not even asking for perfection but hard to find anyone half decent.
2 members like this comment.
Fidges1 - 09 Mar, 2023 - 07:16PM
Yes I no what I want but haven’t found her yet still looking sure she can’t be far away
1 member likes this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 09 Mar, 2023 - 06:03PM
The Temptress - 09 Mar, 2023 - 02:29PM
You have articulated my sentiments. Affairs can sought anywhere, with or without an active profile on IE.
And hey, come join in the banter! 😊😊
3 members like this comment.
The Temptress - 09 Mar, 2023 - 02:29PM
TheBoredHousewife - 08 Mar, 2023 - 08:20PM
You never have to justify yourself to anyone. I have met my lovers on here and never not had an active profile, nor would I give two hoots if also had a live profile, if you have that little faith in your affair then this is not for you.
I am a long time lurker on here and it never ceases to amaze me how judgey people get. Get over yourself and either join in the conversations and have fun or just do one. Why do certain people come on here to cause issue and arguments, definitely does not make you attractive or a catch in fact it is a complete turn off.
4 members like this comment.
Dotty Green - 09 Mar, 2023 - 11:07AM
Beckysharp - 08 Mar, 2023 - 08:25PM
My profile status is hidden - I think that to totally hide it you have to delete it.
I don't have to explain myself to a frustrated bald little man.... who at any point now will start calling us b****s and a coven - we had it all before.
O RFF sounds like things are going well !!!
TBH/LG/Becky - here we know we can chat and be ourselves ask and offer advice and talk bout things that we cant talk about in the real world.
2 members like this comment.
Dotty Green - 09 Mar, 2023 - 11:02AM
Beckysharp - 08 Mar, 2023 - 06:11PM
I think he could be our old friend Martini Rosso ..... ?
2 members like this comment.
Dotty Green - 09 Mar, 2023 - 11:00AM
Hottie Spicy - 08 Mar, 2023 - 05:28PM
Read my profile - does it look like I am actively looking ?
Redfirefox - 08 Mar, 2023 - 09:36PM
Hey Beckysharp
I had a date with a really gorgeous looking guy but he wasn’t for me. No common ground.
I have another date with a guy I’ve been speaking to for quite some time, next week. And another (not yet arranged) meet with another guy I started speaking to a few days ago. They’re completely different from one another but both have something really attractive about them and their persona. I’ll keep you updated x
3 members like this comment.
Eliza Boo - 08 Mar, 2023 - 09:18PM
And the forum is very useful for weedling out certain types of men. Most of the women find their way here, whether they feel able to comment or not, and if they don't there's plenty of chat goes on off here on private grapevines. Just seems a hell of a waste of some guys subs really. I guess that's what strokes their monkey. 🤷♀️
2 members like this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 08 Mar, 2023 - 08:58PM
RFF
The forum is great! I love the sharing as much as you do. And you’re right. Those that we do not go on to have an IE with, sometimes can and do become good platonic friends 😊
1 member likes this comment.
Redfirefox - 08 Mar, 2023 - 08:45PM
HS
Wtf is your problem? Please step down from that awfully high horse of yours and join us mere mortals in a pleasant conversation. Good god it’s like watching a dark grey raincloud descending on was a glorious sunny day.
Ladies do not feel like you should have to explain yourself to anyone. I enjoy the forum. I’ve also made some platonic friends on here and we check in on each other every week. I’ve still yet to meet up with an ie but I know when I do it won’t be a f*cking Chad.
2 members like this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 08 Mar, 2023 - 08:38PM
Hottie Spicy - 08 Mar, 2023 - 08:32PM
It’s 2038h as I type this. I do daytime meets smart chops.
How not to get busted you mean 😏
TheBoredHousewife - 08 Mar, 2023 - 08:33PM
Becks,
Anyone who can find your profile can read it
He’s just talking out of where the sun doesn’t shine.
We are free to use the forum, to chat privately whenever we want, and with whoever we choose. Let noone dictate who we should or shouldn’t speak to 😊
2 members like this comment.
Hottie Spicy - 08 Mar, 2023 - 08:32PM
@BoringHousewife
JSYK whenever anyone on this forum brags about how much sex they are getting they pretty much out themselves as being sex starved fantasists, but woteva 🤣
and look where you are spending your evening - not bouncing around the bedroom but on Illicit Encounters.
Busted.
Beckysharp - 08 Mar, 2023 - 08:25PM
How do you hide your profile so no one can read it? I don’t think you can. Just hide it from appearing online
2 members like this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 08 Mar, 2023 - 08:20PM
Tarzan must be the original Chad. Mine just called me his Jane. No doubt he is thinking about dragging me back to his cave. Not that I won’t go willingly, mind 😜
What is it with people taking it upon themselves to police what others get up to? Do we need to answer to anybody other than ourselves and our lovers as to why we’re here and what we’re doing on it?
3 members like this comment.
Hottie Spicy - 08 Mar, 2023 - 08:12PM
Lorelai, if I can read your profile then it isn't hidden.
And you haven't answered my question.
You may be in the Shetlands but you are still holding out for Chad. If you weren't then you wouldn't be on this site.
Eliza Boo - 08 Mar, 2023 - 06:52PM
Well H.S...I'm in the shetlands and profile set to friendship, so I am an unlikely catch. Also my profile is hidden and my ideal partner section describes my Chad. Plus he's not remotely insecure (even the thought of that makes me snort!) Nope, he knows i am a devoted mistress. I actually think he's quite happy I've found a gaggle of women on here to gossip with when he's busy being a demi-god, instead of my poking him!
It is do lovely of you to be concerned about it though. You are clearly a very sensitive man. Maybe you might be what Doggies, below, is looking for?
😉
2 members like this comment.
Beckysharp - 08 Mar, 2023 - 06:43PM
I’m not sure I buy into the theory much @Doggies
Imho it’s that a lot of men online are after sex and a lot of women online are after relationships. Same on IE and in the real world probably.
Most people end up with someone of a similar level to them in the long term.
I also don’t like tik tok or calling girls (or boys!) ugly though - do feel sorry for teens and twenties today!! God I sound old these days 😂
1 member likes this comment.
Doggies - 08 Mar, 2023 - 06:27PM
Becky
A big proportion of married men get no sex, I feel how thirsty they are and feel sorry for them. Online dating has accentuated mens lonliness as they see all this candy that is out of reach. Countless TikToks are of really quite ugly girls talking about all thier online dating. They can get as much sex as they want, their complaints centre around themen they select never wanting commitment.
The men able to date these girls are the better looking ones but men will shag anything, but know their value so wont select such women as serious long term partners.
So Chad is the only real winner in all this
1 member likes this comment.
Doggies - 08 Mar, 2023 - 06:22PM
Hottie Spicey
I will admit I do seek the ultimate guy ‘Chad’, because nothing else will arouse me. Doesn’t have to be incredibly handsome but just manly, confident and must have a great body. I have actually found him but we now both want a guy to join, he expires does. This other guy we want to be actually not that great looking. Wierd eh! It’s bound-up with a notion if him gifting me to a man who I wouldn’t myself select🫢
Beckysharp - 08 Mar, 2023 - 06:12PM
Tbf I also didn’t declare you an incel. Just the chad terminology makes you sound like one. I’m sure not intended?
Beckysharp - 08 Mar, 2023 - 06:11PM
Hottie Spicy I checked out your profile when TBH wondered if you were Conradd.2. I could see from your photo you’re not 🤷♀️
Although thank you for checking my profile out earlier!
1 member likes this comment.
Hottie Spicy - 08 Mar, 2023 - 05:42PM
Lorelai, what does your affair partner think about you having an active IE profile that doesn't mention you are partnered?
An account that isn't dormant, hence your presence here in the forum?
Eliza Boo - 08 Mar, 2023 - 05:30PM
Well, I couldn't even have imagined I'd meet who I have. Not the Chad from my head, far surpassed those ideas. He's a 10 to me. Wouldn't be to everyone maybe, but obviously I think they must be insane! However, I was willing to lift my distance expectations considerably...
1 member likes this comment.
Hottie Spicy - 08 Mar, 2023 - 05:28PM
Dotty, if you had really found someone perfect you wouldn't have an active profile on IE, would you?
It's like a woman with a "serious" boyfriend who wants to keep her Tinder profile up and running.
1 member likes this comment.
Hottie Spicy - 08 Mar, 2023 - 05:15PM
Beckysharp checks out my profile before (or maybe after) declaring me to be an "incel".
Glad to see the usual suspects don't change their spots 🤣.
My point is, the Chad Chase does nobody any favours - women included.
Do you remember your husband on your wedding day? All of your ex boyfriends?
Were they all Chad?
No???
You have all found happiness (albeit temporary) with not-Chad, yet once online only Chad will do.
Riddle me that, ladies.
1 member likes this comment.
Dotty Green - 08 Mar, 2023 - 04:01PM
Hottie Spicy - 08 Mar, 2023 - 02:34PM
Not sure I agree about the Chad thing..
Personally I sought and found someone perfect for me (and hopefully I am perfect for him or the horrors did he just "settle" for me) Who knows - all I know it is working for me right now.
Again as I have said a million trillion times for me - it is all about meeting quickly to find out if there is an attraction or spark - if not part ways ...
2 members like this comment.
bobbydenero - 08 Mar, 2023 - 03:52PM
I am here for fun and frolics so if either or both of those is missing then it isn't working for me.
TheBoredHousewife - 08 Mar, 2023 - 03:06PM
Did Conradd get reincarnated into another man’s body? 🙈
2 members like this comment.
Beckysharp - 08 Mar, 2023 - 03:00PM
I don’t know about the chad term- makes you sound like an incel @hottie spicy!
But agree I want someone who is a 10 (to me). Luckily they do exist 😉
Hottie Spicy - 08 Mar, 2023 - 02:34PM
Despite what they say, almost every woman on every dating site wants Chad.
Chad is the Perfect 10. Nothing less will do.
Doesn't matter if Chad won't go for anything less than Barbie. They want Chad.
It's funny to come back after a hiatus and see the same profiles still searching for Chad TWO YEARS LATER.
2 members like this comment.
Dotty Green - 08 Mar, 2023 - 10:27AM
Kingsman406 - 07 Mar, 2023 - 04:42PM
For me an early meeting is key, but I know this does not work for some people and sadly some do not want to meet at all and here for an ego boost.
I do wish you well - it is hard being separated but I know it works - for both men and women on here.
My first IE on here, was married and then separated (nothing to do with me) but once he separated it didn't really work for me as I felt we were not on equal footing. However it does work for other :) good luck !
1 member likes this comment.
1460472 - 07 Mar, 2023 - 04:42PM
Hi Dotty
Thank you for the kind words. I totally agree I'm not ugly but definitely no Brad Pitt 😅 but I'm hoping the spark from conversation is enough to get that coffee date and then that's when you really see if there is chemistry...
I've actually had some great advice on my photos and profile so I'm going to change those and see what happens from there. I think the fact I'm separated maybe doesn't help as obviously there is less risk for me but I'm just looking for fun to see where that leads I thought been more available makes you more attractive but maybe it's less so because the associated risks are one sided but I do see plenty of separated and divorced women who are actually favouring married men guess it doesn't work both ways?
Dotty Green - 07 Mar, 2023 - 04:13PM
Kingsman and Niks
Think I have said many many times before, we are not always everyone's cup of tea.... it does not mean we have been hit by the ugly stick it just means that one certain person does not find us attractive, but you will be someone's cup of tea.
I have to agree whilst good communication is key, if there is no attraction then there is no point. However, I remember a few years ago, I went to meet a potential IE, really did not see it going any further than a quick drink, I had had a terrible meeting the week before, work was busy and stressful, so I thought you know what meet him for a nice glass of wine and a chat (our messages had been fun but I just did not think he would be my type). Anyway as soon as we met - instant chemistry resulting in a year long affair... it ended as these things do no hard feelings just a nice memory. This is why I do bang on a lot about at least meeting with someone for that coffee or drink just to see if there is anything.
1 member likes this comment.
Niks01 - 07 Mar, 2023 - 01:31PM
I don’t think a lot of us know what we are exactly looking for or sometimes are too bound by the idea of what we are looking for and unless someone fits the mould perfectly, we reject them. I echo Kingsman406’s comment here- many women would enjoy having a conversation however as soon as they see we are not very gifted in looks there is no road ahead.
1 member likes this comment.
Beckysharp - 07 Mar, 2023 - 01:27PM
There has to be physical attraction too though @kingsman406?
You could always use a face photo for your profile. You’re separated so no reason not to? Then only ladies who already find you attractive will message you!
3 members like this comment.
1460472 - 07 Mar, 2023 - 01:15PM
I find I'm talking to women usually says looks aren't important etc and we hit it off in conversation thrn we get to the dreaded pw exchange and suddenly oh you're nice but not what I'm looking for it's getting quite depressing to be turned down so many times when there's clearly a spark in the conversation
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 07 Mar, 2023 - 11:11AM
Dotty ….the voice of humanity 😊👍
I did have a fanny flutter the other day …a Range Rover constilation blue passed me on the M56😘
3 members like this comment.
Dotty Green - 07 Mar, 2023 - 10:02AM
I think I have been extremely lucky on here - it does take time and as I have said before I will not settle - I need to be attracted to my IE - life is too short to settle, and we risk so much.
One thing I would say - try and meet as soon as you can.... even for a quick coffee you will know once you set eyes on each other if it will progress and if you get the all important fanny flutters !!
I know at times on here it might feel like you will never find your IE, but stick with it, it does work.
Paula99 - 07 Mar, 2023 - 05:28AM
Does it really matter what we prefer …fat ..thin white …black or purple with pink dots? ..the clue is there we are human and we all have had a type no matter what we say 30 years down the line …..but what we thought was ‘important’ then isn’t now as we have our experiences to date …😁
3 members like this comment.
Redfirefox - 07 Mar, 2023 - 12:10AM
Hello mixed_experiences
I’m glad we’ve exchanged our private messages.
It’s crazy how wrong we were about one another. You really are an awesome guy and now you know a little about my backstory and I a little of yours.
No hard feelings xxx 😘
1 member likes this comment.
1581027 - 06 Mar, 2023 - 10:40PM
OK, my apology was more Matt Hancock " I'm sorry for how it made you feel" kind of sorry but not sorry.
Well, after conversing briefly with RFF and looking at her profile I'm genuinely truly sorry.
1 member likes this comment.
rodstripe - 06 Mar, 2023 - 10:38PM
I recall being with an IE after a particularly booze ridden session (the bar staff gave us freebies because we were getting it on) in the South Bank, London when we decided to look for a hotel for a shag when we found another place instead that was costless, private and very erotic but I am not going to tell.
1581027 - 06 Mar, 2023 - 10:19PM
Firefox, this isn't a place for an argument, especially as no party can really put together a decent one within the limiting confines of this forum.
So I will apologise for being the catalyst in a space where we should be supportive... all the more important as we are all in varying states on vulnerability, security, happiness. Being on here is a last resort for most of us and I don't want to make anyone's path on here rocky in anyway.
Xxx
2 members like this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 06 Mar, 2023 - 09:55PM
RFF
I’d have said it for you if you hadn’t spoken up for yourself 👏🏼👏🏼
We all have a right to a preference, whatever that might be.
1 member likes this comment.
1581027 - 06 Mar, 2023 - 09:46PM
Which races are small and petite, can you list them so I can do some research on height distribution please?
You didn't mention the reasons why you're not drawn to certain cultures etc. And it is important to note that skin colour and culture are often separate entities - a black person in the UK will be more similar to an 'indigenous Brit' in culture than the latter is to a Norwegian.
So I identified you might not be talking about race.
Redfirefox - 06 Mar, 2023 - 09:21PM
@missed experiences
Oh please don’t be so butt hurt.
You think I care that most men rule me out because I’m not blonde or brunette?
I’m not on about skin colour in general. Not referring to black, white or mixed. There are certain races I’m not attracted to. For eg there are a number of races that are petite and small in height. I prefer my men to be taller.
I’ve every right to have a have a preference without someone like you trying to chastise me. Grow up!
2 members like this comment.
Beckysharp - 06 Mar, 2023 - 09:02PM
I think I need to 🙉 ha ha
Seriously though, it’s great hearing about IE success stories. Gives me hope ☺️
1 member likes this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 06 Mar, 2023 - 08:56PM
LG
Those ones are so moorish. You have them in little bite sized morsels each time. It’s never enough. You just long for the mega sized bag of deliciousness and want to bury your entire face in it. Too addictive!!
2 members like this comment.
Eliza Boo - 06 Mar, 2023 - 08:41PM
And then someone absolutely amazing exceeds all your expectations and just smashes it out of the ball-park! Someone you couldn't have expected meeting in a million years...
It does happen 😉😘
1 member likes this comment.
1581027 - 06 Mar, 2023 - 08:01PM
I know what I'm not looking for... those who rule out people based upon their nationality and or culture!
I much prefer those who's borders extend beyond this small island.
1 member likes this comment.
WillKr - 06 Mar, 2023 - 07:53PM
teper
Females get an instant gut / fanny response when they first encounter a man they find attractive. Presenting as grey, semi-detached, dad bod. Mr Average ain’t gonna garrner that emotional dump.
So when they tell you no thanks not for me they haven’t had that lightening bolt hit them and forget the rubbish about personality, there still has to be the initial detonation (if its online).
Stick on a metaphorical cape
3 members like this comment.
Doggies - 06 Mar, 2023 - 07:44PM
I’m on here a couple of weeks and the main turn-off I’m encountering is how soft and gentle modern men seem to be, so eager to please that itv strays into handmaiden territory.
Guys we women might be progressives but we all yearn for real men, I’m sorry but pedalling feminine traits is a real ik
1 member likes this comment.
Redfirefox - 06 Mar, 2023 - 07:02PM
Yes. I’m quite specific. It’s easier to say what I’m not looking for than what I’am looking for.
I like varying weight but not extremes thin/morbidly obese.
Not into bald but can’t rule it out now as there have been some fitties. Not into prude nor crude. There are certain nationalities I’m not into. Certain cultures I’m not attracted to.
I like confidence but not immodesty. Funny but not a p*sstake. Someone who makes an equal effort as I refuse to chase. Someone with an adventurous mischievous streak. I like manners, courtesy and respect.
But I swear to God the next man to make the ‘oh you’re alright for a ginger’ ‘or ‘do the collars match the cuffs?’ Will get blocked 🖕🏻
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 06 Mar, 2023 - 03:32PM
I have said this before …
You don’t really know what you want until you find it and then sometimes it’s not quite what you wished for 😊
4 members like this comment.
Hottie Spicy - 06 Mar, 2023 - 11:04AM
Saying "I'll know it when I have found it" is just an excuse for being too lazy to say what you actually want.
1444888 - 06 Mar, 2023 - 09:34AM
The ' I don't know what I'm looking for' statement makes me smile and seriously contradicts the numerous messages I receive saying ' you're not what I'm looking for' is quite uncanny and demonstrates that they actually do! LOL
2 members like this comment.
Marie7403 - 05 Mar, 2023 - 10:25PM
I think most of us say the same about what we are looking for, however sometimes we never truly know until it creeps up on us
1 member likes this comment.
Marie7403 - 05 Mar, 2023 - 10:25PM
I think most of us say the same about what we are looking for, however sometimes we never truly know until it creeps up on us
1 member likes this comment.
Marie7403 - 05 Mar, 2023 - 10:25PM
I think most of us say the same about what we are looking for, however sometimes we never truly know until it creeps up on us
1 member likes this comment.
1586116 - 05 Mar, 2023 - 09:28PM
It’s like going into B&M - you never know what you really want or need until you find it! 🤣
Rubiolicious - 05 Mar, 2023 - 06:00PM
I’m here to escape the daily routine. Explore the unknown. I have no idea what I’m going to find but that’s part of the thrill. Being too prescriptive about what I’m looking for would remove that excitement. Surprise me!
3 members like this comment.
Dotty Green - 05 Mar, 2023 - 05:40PM
I look at each new liaison as a new adventure - I don’t look back or compare.
For me each new affair it’s a clean slate.
Right now I’ve found what I’m looking for ….. and it’s working very well 😈😈
4 members like this comment.
tonicwithice - 05 Mar, 2023 - 04:04PM
I'm not sure I really want to have a clear idea of what I'm looking for. Seems that way disappointment lies. A vague notion and go with the flow will do just fine I think.
laugar164 - 05 Mar, 2023 - 02:56PM
I think you don't really know what you're looking for until you find it most people with have an idea of what they want. But until you chat and meet a person You will know you have found what you are looking for
Trying to find something you have had with someone else will only end in disappointment every person is different in there own ways
Just my Sunday thoughts 😘😘
2 members like this comment.
Glasshalffull - 05 Mar, 2023 - 02:49PM
My belief is the ultimate goal is to find that one person we click with on all levels , but i guess all of us are different in our wants and desires?
It is difficult to say if we click until we actually meet in person , i have met a couple of people who appeared ideal on here and through chatiing but when we met it was evident to both the spark was not as strong as it could be , i had one very long affair with a lovely lady and i think in my head i am hoping to find that again.
1 member likes this comment.
Chris1414 - 05 Mar, 2023 - 02:48PM
Talk dinner walk through the streets home fun passion adventure sleep hot shower hot breakfast explore all aspects of life a little more...
1 member likes this comment.
Runner6969 - 05 Mar, 2023 - 02:27PM
I think this follows on from one of the other recent forum threads.... not looking for perfection but something that works for both of us would be good.
1 member likes this comment.
1586116 - 05 Mar, 2023 - 02:09PM
I have no idea what I’m looking for but it excites me to find out!
Enigma.. - 05 Mar, 2023 - 02:05PM
What I’m looking for is someone who “actually” reads my profile!?!
It’s not difficult 🤷🏼♀️.
Then I wouldn’t have to send the polite thanks… but messages
6 members like this comment.
Bareback Handyman - 05 Mar, 2023 - 12:43PM
For me, I am just looking for one only, sensual sexy woman in Essex or close Where we click and not looking to leave our partners but to find our own sexy secret friendship weekday daytimes, where we meet when we both can, explore our sexy desires and when we part we return to our everyday lives and partners with our sexy secrets in our minds until we meet next, perfect,
Paul
Pleasurepole - 13 Dec, 2022 - 04:27PM
I think we definitely know what we don’t want. As for what we do want I think we’ll be pleasantly surprised that what does fill the void in our lives is something that wasn’t in our thoughts. People who are just looking for sex Will probably want multiple I E’s whereas people like me just want the one friend, lover, companion and partner in crime . Hope you all find what it is you’re missing.
1 member likes this comment.
JonP1974 - 12 Nov, 2022 - 06:27AM
I think we're all on here because something is missing at home and we don't want to change that life, just find something to fill the gap. It's an opportunity to find our physically perfect ideal, or someone that can be a secret friend with additional benefits.
1558991 - 02 Nov, 2022 - 10:45AM
good question fab personality gsoh all fails polite no thankyou.
ExoticOrchid - 01 Nov, 2022 - 05:15PM
Liv2021 - 10:04PM
You should have no problems finding many men here who'd be thrilled to have meaningless sex with you for sure. 👍
6 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 01 Nov, 2022 - 05:13PM
Liv2021 - 10:04PM
You should have no problems finding many men
Paula99 - 01 Nov, 2022 - 04:29PM
Liv21…
Your here for the same reasons as most women are .. your profile states you don’t get enough attention.. intimacy and closeness comes as part of the package..
The hypocrisy and inexperience shows …
6 members like this comment.
Liv2021 - 31 Oct, 2022 - 10:04PM
I hate it when women speak for all other women…sex absolutely rules my life…not all women crave intimacy and closeness…
Some women…lots actually, enjoy the thrill and stress relief of meaningless sex!
I personally don’t crave a deep relationship, a like minded individual, good chat and something I find attractive in them is usually enough…
6 members like this comment.
1560235 - 31 Oct, 2022 - 07:19PM
Personally, not a clue, bit of a virgin at this sort of thing. I will know it when I feel it.
1554859 - 31 Oct, 2022 - 10:20AM
It's difficult to truly know what we are looking for and to be honest I never judge a book by it's cover and it's only when you meet someone for the first time that you will know if there is chemistry. As a guy I enjoy going out for a meal or coffee and a chat just as much as being intimate...I like a rounded relationship.
Paula99 - 31 Oct, 2022 - 05:33AM
MiIpaulac..
Women are not like guys .. sex dosent rule our lives… yes we have needs but we tend to prioritise them…. Women think about sex in terms of intimacy, affection and closeness whereas guys( not all) steer towards the stress relief option.
Women use sex as part of love whereas guys use love for sex 😔
I am here for the same reasons as most women but I know how this works 😽
3 members like this comment.
mipaulac - 30 Oct, 2022 - 09:02PM
Ultimately it is simply sex although I'm dubious whether that is the primary driver for some, particularly females here.
Cassie1963 - 30 Oct, 2022 - 12:50AM
For me, there has to be a total giddy, dizzy, physical attraction….sorry if that makes me sound shallow!
4 members like this comment.
Horror_Fan - 29 Oct, 2022 - 11:46PM
I don't have a set idea of how I want affair partner to look, physically. Age range is the only thing I specify. (Indeed, they don't even have to be a specific gender, since I'm pansexual).
I've made a few contacts, and I think I have found what I was seeking, but I am not going to limit myself to a single partner, so there may be more to my story here. Let's see
Sascha_9 - 29 Oct, 2022 - 12:17AM
Hard to say. There needs to be some initial attraction but is it more of a vibe?
Smartypants65 - 28 Oct, 2022 - 11:40PM
We probably have a good idea of what we think we are looking for....but that first few seconds of a meet generally throws that out of the window....either in a good way or a disappointing way. In my experience there are the non-negotiables, the grey/flexible areas...and often the most exciting ...the really nice surprises. I long for the latter, it's like the icing on the cake, the winning lottery ticket, 'what I go to school for'.
2 members like this comment.
Fidges1 - 28 Oct, 2022 - 07:15PM
Still looking around for a great adventure surely some has a similar mind set
7Emperor - 28 Oct, 2022 - 05:57PM
I know what I want, rather simple really. A partner in crime exploring what our existing spouse won't try.
1 member likes this comment.
Apple_ - 28 Oct, 2022 - 05:56PM
Feel I may have come here a bit prematurely at 31, all the ladies seem to want older men ;)
3 members like this comment.
All Day Breakfast - 28 Oct, 2022 - 05:50PM
Re some of the comments, coming to IE for a ONS is like going to Paris to eat at MacDonalds. There's so much more to experience!!
4 members like this comment.
All Day Breakfast - 28 Oct, 2022 - 05:46PM
There are clearly some things that aren't going to work, but keeping an open mind is a positive thing here. I've met people I'd have never met in the real world and had experiences I wouldn't have expected.Also much easier to cut to the chase about wants and likes when you meet this way, and ironically end up in a much more honest relationship. You can miss out on if you're too prescriptive.
1555545 - 28 Oct, 2022 - 05:41PM
I know exactly what I want but seems most people just want ONS
I’m looking for a real connection with someone and someone who has the same mindset as me. I’m lucky enough to be meeting someone next week but the level of intelligence here is genuinely shocking. Most woman’s profiles seem computer generated and those that are not you never hear back from. So after one week of being here it seems there are very few on my level.
4 members like this comment.
1558506 - 28 Oct, 2022 - 05:05PM
It’s a voyage of discovery. I’ve not been on the site long and being an older male I have not had much luck to date. However, I find it addictive checking if I have any messages not knowing what might be there, if anything, I suppose that I am looking for a connection with someone in the same position as me. Although, I am slightly thinking “should I be on this site?” and feeling slightly guilty, but also naughtily excited!
1546412 - 28 Oct, 2022 - 04:35PM
Having only been on this site for two months, I’m already fully convinced that we- as a rule, there are exceptions- don’t really have a clue what we want, until we get into “the heat of battle”. Some people are all chat, you feel they know you, but then find they keep making excuses not to meet. Others only need a few days, and they’re happy to have a first date, and see what you’re like in person. I have to take my hat off/laugh my ass off at one person’s profile ( which shall remain nameless, so the innocent/guilty are protected), which stipulated that her gentleman callers should have a penis of no less than 8” in length!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I’m not sure if she understands that this is a little like stipulating that women must have a bra size of GG or above. But God Bless her for knowing what she wants !
6 members like this comment.
Peaceful_Spirit_ - 28 Oct, 2022 - 01:21PM
I think it’s an easy option to come here with a set idea of what you want. For me, these are personality traits first and foremost and I will never budge on those expectations
However, having an open mind can often lead to the greatest of surprises.
I know what I want IN a man- how he comes packaged on the outside is in the hands of fate.
3 members like this comment.
EmnEm123 - 20 Oct, 2022 - 03:57PM
Purple dreamer
I'm afraid that's in real life, not on a website!😜
4 members like this comment.
Purple dreamer - 18 Oct, 2022 - 09:24AM
Sometimes it happens when you do not look to hard .......
2 members like this comment.
Bobb20 - 16 Oct, 2022 - 08:37PM
Exactly.
Just think, if we were all looking for someone of the same sex as ourselves, I wonder what traits we would look for? Would a lot of women still want 6ft plus women? Would Conradd be looking for a young boy and dad combo for his fantasy, would little Nathan be looking for another Little Nathan. No it all seems so wrong!
Let’s go back to how it is and forget I spoke :-)
2 members like this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 16 Oct, 2022 - 08:08PM
Bobb20 - 16 Oct, 2022 - 06:18PM
That would certainly be grounds for divorce! 😂😂
Bobb20 - 16 Oct, 2022 - 06:18PM
EO.
Agree 100% I’m certainly not looking for a husband either 😆😆
3 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 16 Oct, 2022 - 04:07PM
I know what I am NOT looking for ... another husband!!! 🤣
4 members like this comment.
Paula99 - 16 Oct, 2022 - 02:23PM
TBH...
I agree totally...kids play you off against each other and kids have enough to contend with the choice of gender...puberty...growing up...kids will get bullied for the wrong colour socks...how are they going to get on with Jonn lives with his daddy and his 6 mummy's...?🤣
1 member likes this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 16 Oct, 2022 - 01:46PM
P99/ ExO
All ok if you’re just casually going around. But once you settle with someone, poly anything is hard to manage. Even poly children - how often do parents try to referee a fight between their kids and get told they are taking sides? I’m sure we love all our children equally 😁
2 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 16 Oct, 2022 - 01:13PM
P99 - 12:41PM
Exactly.
Even if there are no taboos in every society, there will always be the human nature in play ... you cannot stop jealousy, insecurity, obsession, etc, etc ... all the human emotions.
4 members like this comment.
Paula99 - 16 Oct, 2022 - 12:41PM
Stoicix...
Polygamy is banned throughout most of the world..but it is law in places like Africa..india and
other small communities.....it is defined by the Human Rights committee as a violation of the dignity of women..
Most polygamous relationships are set with the man being the lead and having a hareem of women..
How is that fair?
That should tell you alot about which sex is routing for these kind of relationships..
We are programmed to love more than one person at a time...aka your parents...your siblings..friend's.....but all of these are different ..these are born out of mutual respect ..adoration ...nurturing..care..and understanding.
Do you this jealously...insecurity.. emotions..mental health are not present in the polygamous groups?
Why do you think women are desperate to get out of this 'lifestyle'....and then be damned in hell and ostracized from their families?..No win situation...where us the dignity in that?
Be careful what you wish for....😔
3 members like this comment.
Conradd - 16 Oct, 2022 - 12:03PM
Cuckolddress
What u seek does exist as long as all parties bring to the table the sorts of requirements they themselves demand
So if one states a man must have a muscled physique then it’s fairly likely he in turn wants a fit female just as fit women IEs often specify they want a man similarly invested in his body
2 members like this comment.
leggysheila - 16 Oct, 2022 - 08:44AM
I'VE just been looking at some of the comments on this subject and I 'm a bit shocked that I scare a couple of men. Yes I admit that I 've tried a few things but I feel sorry that I scared 😓 a guy XXX
2 members like this comment.
1549813 - 16 Oct, 2022 - 12:10AM
God knows. I’ve had a couple of meets. One was really cautious and the second was unable to stop touching me. Dead odd. I’m finding the need to reflect after meeting and work out if it was right or not on the drive home. One did and one didn’t work… that’s all I’m gonna say 😁 but if you know, you know. In the heat of the first meet though there can be a lot of tensions, expectations, concerns that you don’t see coming. Definitely need time to think and not put each other on the spot about confirming that next meet.
1551011 - 13 Oct, 2022 - 06:58PM
@NaughtyNathan
Go easy on me. I am new to this. But you sound fun
1 member likes this comment.
Eliza Boo - 13 Oct, 2022 - 06:53PM
I've been thinking about this and previously I was all "yes, we are older ... we know what we want".
And now I'm like "actually, we haven't got a f'ing clue!" We think we want steak and chips because we always loved steak and chips. But then we try Hot Sour Soup, and Hot Sour Soup is the best thing ever! But then - Banoffee pie happens...We don't want to eat steak all our life, despite what Steve MQueen said.
3 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 13 Oct, 2022 - 05:27PM
nn96 - 01:11AM
Go on, dare you! 😁
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 13 Oct, 2022 - 11:40AM
Nathan....
Not into 3sums ....sadly..😁
If you can 'do' me and Jesse...you can certainly 'do' leggy Sheila..one
Paula + Jesse = Sheila...😁😁😁
stoicix - 13 Oct, 2022 - 06:57AM
No harm in explorations though. Isn't what this life is about?
How would you know what you really want if you have been a long time in a traditional relationship where focus often ends up on household chores and raising the children. Affairs can help to help open you up.
I would like affairs 2.0 to become more acceptable. Ethical non-monagamy is growing, albeit from a very small base. But once no longer clandestine, no longer a social stigma, we can use them as a tool to really grow without hurting anyone and for everyone's benefit. It's just a mindset switch. Easier said than done, I get it.
naughtynathan96 - 13 Oct, 2022 - 01:11AM
ExoticOrchid,
I don't think I am man enough for leggysheila, she scares me.
Xx
2 members like this comment.
naughtynathan96 - 13 Oct, 2022 - 01:05AM
Joking aside, I know what I want, apart from a year's supply of crunchy nut cornflakes, and that is a confident sexy woman to re-ignite the passion in me. That and a 3some with Paula99 and Jesse40s. 😜
Cold shower here I come ...
1 member likes this comment.
EmnEm123 - 12 Oct, 2022 - 09:44PM
Black Gent
I'm afraid it generally doesn't matter how specific your profile is, a lot of people just ignore it and message anyway.
2 members like this comment.
Black Gent - 12 Oct, 2022 - 06:14AM
Sometimes it is better to be clear about what you do not want...It should be very clear at first glance what your preferences are. life becomes a lot easier when everyone is clear and honest. Even if it comes to specifying whatever your racial preference is.
1551947 - 11 Oct, 2022 - 07:00PM
I think it depends on our level of self awareness... there's often a difference between what we think we want (or think we should want), what we ACTUALLY want, and what we need.
cuckoldress - 11 Oct, 2022 - 02:18PM
I am practiced enough to know precisely what i'm seeking. I am also realistic enough to recognise that it probably doesn't exist. Fortunately, I am adept enough at reaching the odd compromise - always on my own terms :-)
EmnEm123 - 10 Oct, 2022 - 09:19PM
Jesse40s
I wouldn't jump in too quickly!
He has admitted that he is only interested in his own pleasure.
2 members like this comment.
1551011 - 10 Oct, 2022 - 06:55PM
Naughtynathan96
Let’s get it on
2 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 10 Oct, 2022 - 06:08PM
nn96 - 11:56AM
Have you contacted leggysheila yet? I believe you both are on the same page.
3 members like this comment.
mipaulac - 10 Oct, 2022 - 05:53PM
Paula99
you've found a man who will definitely gifting you ......maybe he has a mobile passion wagon too .......:-) ;-)
1 member likes this comment.
EmnEm123 - 08 Oct, 2022 - 05:48PM
P99
Currently, it's Saturday night, I desire a chippy, I will not be disappointed by the reality of it!😁
3 members like this comment.
Paula99 - 08 Oct, 2022 - 07:12AM
Our needs are all different...sometimes our minds trick us into thinking that we ' desire' something but when we discover the reality of it...we are disappointed 😞
What are you looking for ?
This question should be banned..🤣
2 members like this comment.
Countess J - 05 Oct, 2022 - 03:42PM
I know exactly what I'm looking for here on IE. My profile is quite specific to my wants, needs and desires. Unfortunately most men just look at the pretty photos and fail to actually read what I've written. In my opinion it's a bit selfish and rude because now I have to waste my time explaining to you why I don't want your bloody tongue shoved down my throat or desire a full body massage on your canal boat.
1 member likes this comment.
secretflirt68 - 05 Oct, 2022 - 12:41PM
Lioness69 - 05 Oct, 2022 - 05:47AM
As you're living in Scarborough, I think you're looking for the road out of town.
1550415 - 05 Oct, 2022 - 05:47AM
I never know what I’m looking for, only when I look into his eyes… will I know for sure
mipaulac - 05 Oct, 2022 - 12:51AM
BB
you make your shag wagon sound like a tipper truck?!?!? I'm sure that would be useful in some circumstances but fully tricked camper vans have become enormously popular and can be more luxurious and private than any "hotel". Too many ladies here could be turning down what a Hollywood starlet dreams of ...........ha ha
1550864 - 04 Oct, 2022 - 10:23PM
I know excerpt what I am looking for and you will too when I hold you tight and kiss you tenderly 😘
1 member likes this comment.
1483842 - 04 Oct, 2022 - 09:13PM
I know what I'm looking for....its a case of WHEN I find it
Conradd - 04 Oct, 2022 - 09:01PM
Bob
Neither is furnished so its the carpet, the washing machine or the sink.
Fill yer boots ladies, romance ain’t dead😂
2 members like this comment.
topcat2 - 04 Oct, 2022 - 08:32PM
I think some on here think they know what they want but set the bar so high it's unobtainable
5 members like this comment.
Bobb20 - 04 Oct, 2022 - 07:47PM
Conradd,
You need to clone yourself to make full use :-)
2 members like this comment.
Conradd - 04 Oct, 2022 - 06:47PM
I was really peaved that the tenants to 2 flats I own handed in notices at the same time.
Was doing a handovet inspection and it suddenly dawned on me I’ve got 2 naughty cribs which wont be re-let for a few weeks 😈
1 member likes this comment.
Red Succubus - 04 Oct, 2022 - 06:22PM
Johnny
You need to do a search for women in Belfast then send them a message!,🙄
2 members like this comment.
1459664 - 04 Oct, 2022 - 06:09PM
I'm looking for a lady friend in or around Belfast. Perhaps that's not the purpose of this forum, but that's what I want!
dave68421 - 04 Oct, 2022 - 06:00PM
good afternoon ladys im dave im new not sure wat to say no dout i will get help lol
Paula99 - 04 Oct, 2022 - 02:03PM
EE123...
Binge watched Jeffrey Dahmer.....bit slow in the beginning...but it was good....different to Dennis Nielson..and John Christie....I am quite surprised he didn't 'hear voices'...he was portrayed as having autistic tendencies....quite sad in some ways and the racism with the police was very true for the times...😔
1 member likes this comment.
Giulio - 04 Oct, 2022 - 01:44PM
Sometimes is better don't found or easy we leave for another looking for
EmnEm123 - 03 Oct, 2022 - 10:57PM
P99
I didn't mean 'doing you', as in sex.
I said 'doing you in', as in serial killer, re my previous post.
Blueboy, no offense, I don't think you're a serial killer!🥵🤔😂
Thankfully, the absolute state my bush is in, you'd run a mile, screaming!
4 members like this comment.
Dotty Green - 03 Oct, 2022 - 09:25AM
leggysheila - 30 Sep, 2022 - 11:26PM
I literally love you !!! I do not think there is much you have not seen or done!! Love it !
1 member likes this comment.
1542317 - 02 Oct, 2022 - 08:00AM
EE123
I have lots of my own sanitiser ….😉
Paula99 - 01 Oct, 2022 - 09:44PM
EE123...
Yes I have but I was much younger then...🤣🤣
I don't think he would be 'doing me' for one minute....there again if he wanted me to remove something from an orifice...or from the back of his van....I could save his life..🤣🤣🤣🤣
1 member likes this comment.
EmnEm123 - 01 Oct, 2022 - 08:55PM
P99
You're a bloody nurse, I'm sure you've seen a damn site worse!😂
I'd rather the back of Bluboys van than some hospital conditions.
Perhaps he has plenty of sanitiser?
But if he was doing you in, does it matter??!🥵🤔😂
Paula99 - 01 Oct, 2022 - 05:22PM
I would be quite happy driving one of those posh vans but not shagging in it...
It can't be the most comfortable place...plus all that PPE ..tools..dirty boots..and God knows what ever lurking around....PASS..😷
1 member likes this comment.
EmnEm123 - 01 Oct, 2022 - 04:04PM
Naughty Jason
A rich heiress? Could I not be rich from my own hard work and success? I'm not!😂
I don't remember posting anything about doing my ironing, seems a bit boring even for me but to keep the theme going, my bloody washing machine, that is just more than a year old is on the blink.
Hopefully I will be all sorted on Monday!😂
EmnEm123 - 01 Oct, 2022 - 03:58PM
Blueboy 1981
Stop talking about the back of your van!
I presume you have tools in the back?
I binge watched that Jeffrey Dahmer series on Netflix last week, you sound a wee bit scary!🥵🥵🥵😂
leggysheila - 30 Sep, 2022 - 11:26PM
Dotty Green
I'VE been done on the bonnet of a couple of cars XXX
Naughty Jason - 30 Sep, 2022 - 10:53AM
EmnEm
Now you boasting, not about the fact that you've got your ironing done or the fact that your mood is not dependent upon anyone else but about the fact that you can afford to put in the heating. You must be a rich heiress. Lol
Dotty Green - 30 Sep, 2022 - 10:31AM
Blueboy1981 - 30 Sep, 2022 - 06:41AM
You’ll get people talking 😂😂🐍🤦🏻♀️
1 member likes this comment.
1542317 - 30 Sep, 2022 - 06:41AM
@Dotty
Considering you have seen my meat…. 😬🤫 about time you booked a slot in my van ain’t it 😂
1 member likes this comment.
Dotty Green - 30 Sep, 2022 - 06:17AM
TheBoredHousewife - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:53PM
Thanks 🙏🏻
1 member likes this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:53PM
Dotty Green - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:28PM
I think it is nice that you share, and for some it may be what they are after, or already experience for themselves. For others, it might be a no go zone as their idea of an illicit encounter is utterly different!
The sharing of ideas and opinions is what keeps this forum alive, whether we agree with them or not.
3 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:41PM
DG - 09:34PM
Oh yes, true ... perhaps he can lift you up ... 🤔
1 member likes this comment.
Dotty Green - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:34PM
ExoticOrchid - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:26PM
On the bonnet of a van … I’d never reach 😂😂😂
3 members like this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:28PM
ExoticOrchid - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:00PM
I certainly find the idea of sex in a pub loo repugnant.
Agree, hence the quip about the cuddles at the end - it happens to be my current status. “Less than love, more than sex” is a much better way to put it 😊
5 members like this comment.
Dotty Green - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:28PM
So I’ve met my IE so have many others. I enjoy the chat on here and enjoy the banter.
I don’t have to lie or impress anyone … and I find it so strange a total stranger is so jealous and has so much hate .., quite astounding.
Sad so much toxicity!
Anyway each to their own snd we’re all here to have fun.
5 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:26PM
DG - 09:11PM
I thought maybe you meant ON the bonnet ... 🤣
2 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:21PM
EE123 - 09:12PM
I like my creature comforts and totally agree about being see in public ... also, the thought of being caught by passers-by definitely does NOT turn me on ... I know some get off on that ... not me!!! Can't think of anything worse ... I'll die of embarrassment!!! 😳
To be fair, I do know there are those who are not lying.
3 members like this comment.
EmnEm123 - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:12PM
Exotic
I don't mind the back of a car or outside in the countryside, somewhere private, why anyone would want to be seen in public is beyond me.
A private club for some maybe, not for me.
My point, always on here is to be honest, I can't stand the liars, the fantasists, the I have met a 10/10, she's so gorgeous I'm scared I may fall for her when I have a beautiful wife and a great sex life.
I have an IE, it's so great, it's on my profile that I am not meeting anyone, but I am on here constantly. Plus people message me about other members, which I bother to respond to!😂😂😂
4 members like this comment.
Dotty Green - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:09PM
ExoticOrchid - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:00PM
It’s true ! It’s not all woman that demand hotel rooms.
So far I’ve not had anyone offer to take me on their van … always a first time tho eh BB 😂
The guys I’ve met have been on the same page …
1 member likes this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 29 Sep, 2022 - 09:00PM
TBH - 08:27PM
Indeed ultimately it is sex but NOT "just sex" for SOME of us ... I'm not looking for sex in the back of a van or in the pub toilet ... not all men are either believe it or not... as someone here long ago said ... "less than love, more than sex" ... very true in my case.
Oh and before some start ... I've done the swinging scene, I've done the club scene, I've done the private party scene ... therefore I do know what I'm talking about and I know they are ultimately NOT my scene.
7 members like this comment.
EmnEm123 - 29 Sep, 2022 - 08:52PM
Exotic
Apparently we are single because we are awful and have opinions.
Like you, I am deliberately single, I have my central heating on for the first time this year, ironing done for work tomorrow, chilling out on the couch
Not worrying about someone else's mood, not dependent on anyone else, comfortable, relaxed, happy, by myself.
But yes, looking for sex, intimate, fun times with a real, honest man!
3 members like this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 29 Sep, 2022 - 08:49PM
Paula99 - 29 Sep, 2022 - 08:40PM
Lol maybe not
I am 100% opt-in for cuddles!! 😂
ExoticOrchid - 29 Sep, 2022 - 08:44PM
EE123 - 08:09PM
My comments are usually innocuous (and fair to both sexes) even if certain people who don't know me call me a bitch and think that because I am here on the Forum I must be old, fat and ugly with no IE ... those who know me know different! 😉
Actually I do have regular meets for lazy afternoons (and evenings and overnights) in nice hotels where I provide the champagne and snacks and buy him breakfast while he pays for the room and dinner.
Like you, I'm single but I have a "real" life too as I'm sure you do as well and never the twain shall meet is my motto hence being on IE which suits me.
4 members like this comment.
Paula99 - 29 Sep, 2022 - 08:40PM
TBH....
Blueboy1981 will be chuffed...
😁
3 members like this comment.
TheBoredHousewife - 29 Sep, 2022 - 08:27PM
Not wanting to sound like I’m on Blueboy’s corner in this post, but at the end of the day, it really is just sex.
Always nicer to have it with someone regular that you fancy, and certainly more comfortable in a clean bed with crisp sheets.
Sometimes emotions can get in the way. But let’s get back to why the majority of us are here on IE. It’s for the sex.
And maybe a few cuddles 😉
4 members like this comment.
Dotty Green - 29 Sep, 2022 - 08:24PM
O the toxic singleton is back spewing her jealousy … such a nasty trait
I’d rather be me any day ….,
Why so jealous dear ??
The fact I’m in charge of my own diary shows I work hard so therefore can play hard …
Quite amusing a few people messaged me about you some who post and some who lurk saying how awful you are … I stand by previous comments … no wonder you’re single.
Now do me a favour don’t bother mentioning me again … and I’ll do the same to you
4 members like this comment.
EmnEm123 - 29 Sep, 2022 - 08:09PM
Exotic
I am surprised you got away with that completely innocuous comment.
I was under be the impression that women have to claim that they have an IE ( long term) whom they regularly meet for lazy afternoons, with sexy lingerie, food that they pay for in really nice hotels.
For example, the Poundland Dotty Green, in charge of her own diary?
Or Conradd, he doesn't like to brag, but has five houses.
Jings, really, I am serious when I say I would honestly be with an honest, hardworking person, than a blagger/bragger!😂😂😜
ExoticOrchid - 29 Sep, 2022 - 07:45PM
I know what I'm NOT looking good for ... a husband!!! 😖
2 members like this comment.
Dotty Green - 29 Sep, 2022 - 07:25PM
Paula99 - 29 Sep, 2022 - 06:30PM
Wise words
I just think I’ve found the Mr Right now .., enjoy the moment while it lasts ….
It like that poem reason season lifetime
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 29 Sep, 2022 - 06:30PM
The question 'Do we really know what we are looking for?..this is in the same category as ' Do you think there is a God?
Some people spend a lifetime searching..
Personally I don't think we will ever find the right person not twice in a lifetime anyway
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 29 Sep, 2022 - 05:32PM
Scoundrel69...
Totally agree...the poignant element is the "swinging'..not just about having sex with others but it gives married couples something to do together...after the careers and children your sex life goes to zero because you have spent so much time apart...you don't fancy each other...at least at the 'exclusive club's' they can be with others that they fancy....
Its not the right thing for me...but I can see the attraction...😁
1 member likes this comment.
Scoundrel69 - 29 Sep, 2022 - 03:10PM
Many on IE think they know and some do but some do not. Many wives find themselves in sexless marriages and crave an active sex life again. It is only natural that after a long time living with one person that the physical attraction diminishes. There is also the arrival of children and the demands that brings. Careers can equally interfere climbing the corporate ladder. I think that most IE users are driven by their desire for better sex lives but some will camouflage that as the core reason. Funnily, I know several marriages that had drifted into little if any sex and were saved by the couple entering the swinging world, swinging together. That may sound outrageous to some but it worked for them and restored their domestic sex life.
FireGarden - 24 Sep, 2022 - 09:38PM
Good question! Besides the obvious, I guess it would be having the opportunity to have a special friend where you can come as you are (no pun intended) in an alternate universe where your identity is yours alone (in contrast to the real world where in front of friends and family you tend to become a "we" i.e. couple) ... and be yourself!
Purple dreamer - 21 Sep, 2022 - 08:22AM
I hate that question "what you looking for?" my normal response is the fountain of eternal youth
FluffyClouds - 20 Sep, 2022 - 02:29PM
EmnEm -
He said who he'd been chatting to and I recognised the name from here. He was under the impression we were friends outside IE. Totally bizarre tbh.
2 members like this comment.
FluffyClouds - 19 Sep, 2022 - 09:48PM
Haresh -
'I saw one website where you could "recommend to a friend" just imagine that, if you don't fancy someone enough based on photo, you can just pass her onto a friend!!'
Funny you should mention this. I got a message a few weeks back from someone I said I wasn't interested in. He messaged me to say 'your friend from here reckons we will be more suited'. I actually panicked, wondering who this friend was! Turned out it was a female from this forum who knows me not at all, but thought they could recommend me to their reject. Thing is, I'd already rejected him once. Rather annoyed me.
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 10:48PM
Blue(boy)...not a man
Don't kid yourself....your loving it...
Its all you have to look forward too....
haresh - 18 Sep, 2022 - 10:29PM
Paula99 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 05:17PM
"Recommendation to a friend?"
Can you just imagine how offensive that is ??
"I didn't fancy you, but I thought I'd pass you to a mate that might!!"
Slider84 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 10:29PM
Of course we don't know, how can we? In a world of constant distraction and the ability to have your coffee 16 ways, we have lost direction. It may be true of this site too and why we're all here. I don't really know, I'm just rolling with it. All I know is when I finish work, I want a beer and peace and quiet before my days off and Mr. Hyde decides he wants to get messy.
2 members like this comment.
EmnEm123 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 10:06PM
Bluebhoy 1981
No-one is forcing you to be here.
Don't deny that you enjoy it.
So you only last 2 minutes, what a stud.
secretflirt68 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 10:04PM
Knowing what we’re looking for, and what we’ll get, are very different. What we’re looking for is idealistic - imagination runs riot. The reality is that the people on here for genuine reasons, have been a bit beaten by life experience, and need a little love to be their best self. So I would say people need to remember that a lot of members have been on a ‘journey’, and that the person they’re looking for might be a bit different to the image in their mind. So - do we know what we’re looking for? Maybe - but we may not know when we find it, because we don’t take the time to realise.
4 members like this comment.
1542317 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 09:18PM
It’s ok porky99
You can come watch if you like, I’ll get you a kebab to entertain you for all of my 2 mins
1542317 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 09:08PM
I see old porky has called in the cavalry as always 😂
Absolute pathetic you lot, you just can’t stop yourselves taking over every topic
And I couldn’t careless if it’s sloppy 100s, if she’s hot and moist…. It’s all good
Could be worse, like having to navigate past all your rolls😂….
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 08:59PM
EE123...
Blue(BOY)...has his 10/10 ..he's got to wait 2 weeks to shag her......wonder if she shags at least 4 in-between....sloppy 2nds..3rds...4ths...😷
3 members like this comment.
Luscious69 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 08:28PM
Conradd, I suggest you put some effort into your profile, us ladies may be less likely to give fake reasons for rejecting you.
2 members like this comment.
Conradd - 18 Sep, 2022 - 06:56PM
I get rejected for not having enough hair, women can be very exacting in their shopping lists😂
1 member likes this comment.
1542317 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 06:22PM
Meeting an absolute worldy week after next
She is gonna destroy me……. Hopefully 😁
1 member likes this comment.
Dotty Green - 18 Sep, 2022 - 06:03PM
Yes … I’ve looked … I’ve found …
I’m realistic… it’s for the here and now … who knows how long it will last but I’ll enjoy the moment until it ends ….
2 members like this comment.
Paula99 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 05:58PM
reema...
Both sexes are guilty of being 'shallow'....we have websites full of people with unrealistic expectations...
3 members like this comment.
Paula99 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 05:17PM
Recommendation to a friend?
Does that really work.?..if you do your nasty ..if you don't your nasty..
Those kind of websites should be banned..☹️
1 member likes this comment.
reema - 18 Sep, 2022 - 05:09PM
Men are still very shallow. Women can be slightly more forgiving on their ‘wish’ list.
haresh - 18 Sep, 2022 - 03:06PM
Conradd - 18 Sep, 2022 - 02:36PM
totally agree.
"Attraction is definitely easier in the real world thats for sure when you can interact"
Definatley, you can hear each others voice and observe body language and facial expressions.
"This online thing is unduly casual so we see people like a pack of Top Trumps quickly dismissing one after another, ‘oh well onto the next’"
Photos are not really a good indication, I saw one website where you could "recommend to a friend" just imagine that, if you don't fancy someone enough based on photo, you can just pass her onto a friend!!
I'm not photogenic at all, I look like a dork, weirdo. However I can always chat to women in a pub, bar or park.
1 member likes this comment.
Conradd - 18 Sep, 2022 - 02:36PM
Attraction is definitely easier in the real world thats for sure when you can interact.
This online thing is unduly casual so we see people like a pack of Top Trumps quickly dismissing one after another, ‘oh well onto the next’
4 members like this comment.
Red Succubus - 18 Sep, 2022 - 02:09PM
Yes I know what I am looking for, unfortunately the majority in here don’t. Too many fantasists, time wasters and those that just haven’t thought through what they want
Bullshit bingo if you ask me!
6 members like this comment.
Paula99 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 01:35PM
There is a realm of fantasy here...as long as you respect it for what it is...😊
In life we are always wishing for something we can't have or a fear of missing out...its just the way our brain computes..
Life delivers most of the baggage but it also gives you the idea that the majority of us have to accept this is our LOT..
I come from the generation of 'you earned it and you gained self respect...but today's people are in the 'entitled' bracket'..
No expectations...no agenda...SIMPLE
2 members like this comment.
haresh - 18 Sep, 2022 - 01:23PM
Here4U21 - 20 Apr, 2022 - 07:50PM
Totally agree, I am choosy. If all I wanted was intercourse (not sex) then I would go to a prostitute. Something which I find really gross. Just a personal thing.
As we get older many of us maybe look back on our lives and memories and think "is that it?" "will I ever experience that joy again?"
Some people do just accept the fact that they are just going to grow old and fat and lazy etc and just give up.
I want to be look forward to meeting a lady who smiles at me, makes me laugh, knows how to converse. It's not just sex, that's just animalistic.
1100888 - 18 Sep, 2022 - 12:20PM
There is the fantasy and there is the reality.
Looking at most women's profiles, it seems that the majority want god bod, the reality in the age range they are looking for you're gonna get dad bid.
There is the expectation of an intimate amount of time, the reality, we work, we have a family life.
But it is the same the other way round, men have the expectation of a porn star, who can drop their lives at the drop of a hat.
We should all be a little bit more honest with ourselves. Friends with Benefits either long term or short term is probably the reality for most on here with somebody just as flawed as you are
7 members like this comment.
Chezley - 18 Sep, 2022 - 11:38AM
Paula
Sounds like the start of a novel, where's the rest...
2 members like this comment.
All things and wonderful - 18 Sep, 2022 - 09:14AM
Knowing what we are looking for and actually finding what we looking for is always a challenge, I would say no we don't know what we looking for. One hopes to stumble across one 😀🤞
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 10 Jul, 2022 - 05:17PM
You spend years of intense passionate sex..your senses taking you to the heights of pleasure...you imagine life can't be the same without him/her..then something pulls you back and you're perspective alters...the sex is no more.......
2 members like this comment.
Here4U21 - 20 Apr, 2022 - 07:50PM
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t looking for a woman to have sex with. But not any woman will do. I speak for myself when I say I need that connection too.
Not every man thinks and behaves like a neanderthal.
5 members like this comment.
1515202 - 20 Apr, 2022 - 06:54PM
Point (here) ———> Chezley (way over somewhere else)
Taking Blueboy under his wing is a fantastic idea. There is much to learn from the great master.
3 members like this comment.
truth and logic - 20 Apr, 2022 - 02:51PM
I need a connection to have good sex, its just how im wired...otherwise i would hook up with a random stranger whenever i work away. It has nothing to with whats missing at home, im happy at home, but thats does not mean i look for sex and happiness away form home. A meaningless leg over is not worth the risk to me. I want great sex , but i only find it with someone i like to spend time with and interests me. If others dont need that then , fine but dont make those who do out to be the sad ones. We think we are worth better.
5 members like this comment.
1117169 - 20 Apr, 2022 - 02:03PM
@Londonladye6
They are best ignored I think.
2 members like this comment.
1497533 - 20 Apr, 2022 - 09:55AM
Wow. Would love some of the people on here to meet face to face, away from the safety of a keyboard. Would there be pistols at dawn or just hiding behind their mums
3 members like this comment.
Chezley - 20 Apr, 2022 - 09:28AM
UK femme
Flatulent rhetoric. Because you certainly can not speak of the generalities of men.
Blueboy is right, because the majority of men come here with that mindset. Its how we are wired, period.
3 members like this comment.
Chezley - 20 Apr, 2022 - 09:20AM
Sportsperson!
I say, steady on.....
Bit unlike you to launch a judgement.
Get back to your normal simping, woke behaviour.
3 members like this comment.
1515202 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 07:23PM
@BB1981
You speak for many men, but not all.
And there are many women who want the same sort of hookups as these men, but not all.
Some are messed up, many are not. You don’t know the history of everybody who comes on IE.
Why are you here? What is your story?
If you find the demands of certain women so seemingly outrageous, it is your right not to choose them and go for those who actually will be happy to jump into bed with you.
After reading your posts though, I’m not sure very many will. But best of luck! 🍀👍
9 members like this comment.
1516594 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 06:37PM
You have a point Blueboy but the reason is children. It's actually a happy atmosphere at home and maintaining that for them is more important than my own feelings. The marriage is functional but little more. So it works for me to be on here. It's not ideal, you are right, but that romance has already enriched my life in so many ways once, and as far as I'm concerned it's the only life I'm going to get so I'd like to make the most of it, while I've got my health and young good looks! And I don't need to view and treat women like sex objects in the process. Although I'm sure some love that. Horses for courses.
3 members like this comment.
1117169 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 06:07PM
@Vixendreams
You give the impression that relationships formed via IE are essentially transactional, that you have a personal financial barrier to entry and the greater the amount transacted in your direction the better.
1 member likes this comment.
Gormlessoaf - 19 Apr, 2022 - 05:56PM
Vixendreams
Actually costs rise precipitously when arranging anything here. Way beyond the quality of the fuck. Silly prices for accommodating, overeating and drinking, sexy dressing. Jeez.
5 members like this comment.
1508936 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 05:37PM
Why are you even married if you are wanting romance and all that other crap, surely you must be extremely unhappy at home to be coming here for emotional “connection”, yet you don’t want to leave your marriage
It’s so messed up it’s hilarious 😆
3 members like this comment.
Chezley - 19 Apr, 2022 - 04:54PM
My usual disdain for the predictable response to Blueboy.
Produce as many reasons and excuses for putting off sex as you require to complicate your lives and justify why.
But you all hunger for true burning desire. That force you willfully submit to. The dark gods.
Otherwise Jam and Jerusalem?
4 members like this comment.
1515576 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 04:05PM
I am not here to be a man’s budget prostitute
If that means I have unrealistic expectations so be it. There are many ways a man can get a leg over just when he’s in the area on business if he can’t be bothered to pay for it then he doesn’t get to come on here and save himself a few bob
No effort no meet let alone anything else
1516594 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 03:56PM
Gosh, no! Totally non-descript, like me 🤪, though it's not entirely random either. I was talking to P99 about a partyline though so I'm reserving the right to use it for that.
1117169 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 03:25PM
@742695
Agree.
Is that part of your mobile number by the way?
1 member likes this comment.
1117169 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 03:24PM
Blueboy1981 might be a misandrist woman!
2 members like this comment.
1516594 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 12:15PM
Blueboy, stop giving us a bad name! Coffee and romantic walks were some of the most memorable times for me. Strolling along, hand in hand, laughing, getting to know one another; moments where you felt like the last two people on Earth and nothing else mattered and you could happily have hit the 'stop' button for it never to end. Those feelings, when reciprocated, are up there with anything that may follow in the bedroom.
3 members like this comment.
truth and logic - 19 Apr, 2022 - 10:31AM
Blue boy 1981 coffee is too much to ask? I would say pay for sex if you dont want to be sociable and a friend too , but if coffee is too much to ask , i guess you would not want to pay either . Some of us here dont just want a fuck, we know great sex is worth a little work and happens more when the connection is real...
5 members like this comment.
1497533 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 10:23AM
Blueboy1981 - 18 Apr, 2022 - 09:22PM
And you speak for all men? Sorry to break it to you but you're wrong
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 05:21AM
BlueBoy1981...are you speaking for all the guys on here or just yourself?
...you do seem to label women in general..
Or maybe you like to stir the shit a little?
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 19 Apr, 2022 - 05:20AM
BlueBoy1981...are you speaking for all the guys on here or just yourself?
...you do seem to label women in general..
Or maybe you like to stir the shit a little?
1 member likes this comment.
1508936 - 18 Apr, 2022 - 09:22PM
Us men on IE know exactly what we are here for, and it most definitely isn’t to go for coffee, romantic walks, gifts and all that nonsense
You ladies on the other hand just wow 🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️
Unrealistic expectations or what
Paula99 - 18 Apr, 2022 - 09:07PM
Johnnnnnny....
As uncultured as you seem to be...there is no use knocking there is no one at home..😕
1117169 - 16 Apr, 2022 - 12:05PM
@Johnnnnnnnny
Who do you think I am? Will Smith?
Oops. Just looked down at my feet and I'm wearing mine now.
1 member likes this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 16 Apr, 2022 - 11:56AM
I was under the impression I had come to live in a "free" world 🤔
Johnnnnnny - 16 Apr, 2022 - 11:48AM
@sportster
I think you are being too generous. Cultural appropriation is Ed Sheeran doing a bit of grime- not right but debatable as to how wrong it is.
Moccasins however are just unacceptable and nobody could blame you for giving the wearer a quick slap in the chops.
1117169 - 16 Apr, 2022 - 10:45AM
@Johnnnnnnnnnnnnny
Unless you really are a Native American, wearing moccasins is simply cultural appropriation and it should be called out on social media ☺
Johnnnnnny - 16 Apr, 2022 - 10:31AM
@Paula99- unless the man really is a Native American I’m going to go ahead and judge him simply on the basis that he’s wearing moccasins.
1500294 - 16 Apr, 2022 - 10:23AM
I’m not sure we do know, we have an idea of what we want or are looking for but I think it’s always best to have an open mind.
Who knows?
1510609 - 09 Apr, 2022 - 11:40AM
I do.
Paula99 - 28 Mar, 2022 - 08:24PM
Old adage....never judge a man until you have walked a mile in his moccasins..
Doricles - 28 Mar, 2022 - 04:49PM
On a website called 'Illicit Encounters' it would be logical to assume that members are looking for, guess what, an illicit encounter. The clue's in the title! This isn't a dating forum per se its "The UK's leading married-dating website". Married people come on here to meet other people for occasional sex and naughtiness: to have an illicit encounter. Of course, there are single, separated and divorced members who are looking to meet up with other single, separated, or divorced members, however, their encounters are not really 'illicit' as they're free agents. Some members may enjoy years of secret messaging, regular meetings and amazing sex with 'a special IE member', or members (plural). Some might even fall head over heals in love with their IE playmate and ride off into the sunset, holding hands, and never looking back. But for most, its escapism: its about spending some quality time with a like minded person who also just wants too feel loved, wanted and desired again. Oh and sex: don't forget the sex!
7 members like this comment.
EmnEm123 - 22 Mar, 2022 - 02:58PM
How can people who are married/coupled up/ have children together, never have experienced love?
That is so depressing, I feel sorry for you. Perhaps not, your own foolish/ ridiculous choice.
@Mirror Shades
No, No, No.
Utter garbage.
I get why people are on here, relationship breakdowns, lack of intimacy, the Human Condition.
To say that you love the father of your children, have had multiple affairs with people you have been and are still in love with is questionable.
I would suggest that you don't know what love truly is.
Perhaps you just want a bit of strange and use the excuse of love to make it seem acceptable?
If a man had posted that comment, a lot of the women would have came down on him like a tonne of bricks, a supposed cheater, user, player, saying anything that they think a woman wants to hear.
1 member likes this comment.
kinkynurse - 22 Mar, 2022 - 10:42AM
When you find that certain someone, when you feel it deep down when your eyes meet
1117169 - 17 Mar, 2022 - 07:41PM
@Naughty But Nice
I haven't written any recently but I had a prolific spell between 2010 and about 2018 when I had " The Muse" though I did write a new one this New Years Eve when I was thinking about the concept of past, present and future and time itself.
1506940 - 17 Mar, 2022 - 04:50PM
Sportser,
Well, I haven't got one yet!!!
So, I guess it will ebb and flow when I meet him, and adaptations will be made. I just don't want a purely carnal liaison, that's all.
You write poetry, you say? I like poetry... especially spoken word. I write a little... not giving up my day job, though 😂
1117169 - 17 Mar, 2022 - 03:57PM
@Sweettalk
A very funny dig at Profile Wizard profiles. 😉
1 member likes this comment.
1117169 - 17 Mar, 2022 - 03:54PM
@ Naughty But Nice
I do understand what you say, I'm just asking you to think about how it might play out with your lover. Relationships should not be on one persons terms.
By the way, I used to work for the council too, and I have written some poetry, so I do appreciate the Bonsai analogy.
1 member likes this comment.
1506940 - 17 Mar, 2022 - 06:56AM
Sportser,
I didn't mean that the MAN was like a bonsai tree ...I was trying to be poetic about the enotion being contained because of the circumstances we find ourselves in....
I'm not actually a poet...I work for the council.
1469532 - 16 Mar, 2022 - 08:27PM
I know what I’m looking for
A woman who
Loves Elton John but disfavours salami
I can find watching coronation street but never fishing of the coast of Anglesey.
Has a keen fondness for Beethoven and One Direction but less so for the 10 Commandments
Smiles when she finds a fiver in her pocket but has an intense dislike for caterpillars.
Get my drift?
2 members like this comment.
Mirror Shades - 16 Mar, 2022 - 08:02PM
@EmmEm123 whilst I see the point you're making, yours is an incredibly narrow view of things...
As @Paula99 suggests, there are many different disguises....
I love someone.... truly, madly, deeply.... I can't be with them all the time..... there are all sorts of reasons for that which are too complicated to go into here....
I love the father of my children.... that is different but equally precious.... I have also had affairs with people who I still love.... and they were classic 'love affairs'....
I have been able to control all that, have continued to love and be in love simultaneously.... It has never been a case of switching it off or on.
For sure there will be people more hard headed and clinical on this site than me and I wish them well but I have never had a problem with the different compartments and chapters of my life..... maybe I am just incredibly lucky but would again say that I totally get the scenario that @Naughty But Niche outlines....
Each to their own I guess....
Love and peace
2 members like this comment.
EmnEm123 - 16 Mar, 2022 - 06:27PM
@Naughty But Niche
I agree with Sportster, love can't be limited to moments, hours, days that suit.
If you can control yourself like that, you're not in love.
Love isn't something that can be switched on and off.
This is IE, illicit encounters, not a love affair, run from partners, life site.
Can you all not see this?
1 member likes this comment.
Paula99 - 16 Mar, 2022 - 06:03PM
Some folk haven't experienced real love so can't make an informed decision.
Love comes in many disguises...
We are programmed to 'love '
I have spent 25 years with one guy ..do I love him?....yes but I am not in love with him...He's the father of my children...😊
2 members like this comment.
1117169 - 16 Mar, 2022 - 05:54PM
@ Naughty But Nice
I would also ask you to consider how your lover would feel if he did fall in love with you and told you. Would you say
" I love you too, but only every other Wednesday and Friday between 11.00 and 18.00. The rest of the time I don't. I see you as a Bonsai tree which needs to be kept on its shelf and only taken down and admired when its time to pay it some attention. Don't think about going beyond the predetermined boundaries I have set for us"
Love ( Whatever it means) can't be compartmentalised or switched on and off at your convenience. You can't visualise people as objects of utility.
2 members like this comment.
Mirror Shades - 16 Mar, 2022 - 05:43PM
Ha ha temperatures are rising.... 🔥🔥
What is "love"?
To be fair @Sportster1200L it does rather read like you are trying to offer an interpretation at least....
And @EmmEm123 we all have our own way of looking at things... It is ABSOLUTELY possible to love different people in different ways.... whether it be children, parents, life partners and/or discreet partners....
So I am in the camp of @Naughty But Niche and @Lostinchance (who I could be interested to meet.... 😱)
Yes I know what I am looking for - I can't understand why it has to be complicated....or why it should be surprising or any mystery....
3 members like this comment.
EmnEm123 - 16 Mar, 2022 - 05:31PM
@Naughty But Niche
Dress it up however you want to, that's not love, it's just sex.
Granted feelings can develop but if you are seeking true love, a hotel meet now and again , isn't and will never be love.
Same for the women, if your most important love has been an affair, take a look at your own choices.
I've previously met a fantastic man on here, liked him a lot, no love affair.
Nothing compared to real life/love.
Get real.
3 members like this comment.
1117169 - 16 Mar, 2022 - 11:07AM
@Naughty But Nice
I did not attempt to define "Love" nor would I try.
1418715 - 16 Mar, 2022 - 10:31AM
I know what I am looking for....
I subscribe to a lot of what @Naughty But Niche describes.... It is about having something on a different parallel... Real but seperate, compartmentalised....
I might be a bit simplistic in that I see it as perfectly achievable.... I guess the challenge for many is thinking that there is no need to compromise on our "wants" and therefore find many reasons not to progress....
I am of course excluding those who have no real intention of developing an affair which is an entirely different matter and has no doubt been debated at length elsewhere....
2 members like this comment.
1506940 - 16 Mar, 2022 - 08:08AM
@sportser
Thank you for your definition of love but it is, in our language, a single word of many meanings. Like the Inuit people have many words for snow because they experience many types of snow English speakers lack the broader lexicon of love....we are all different people and have a different experience, we only have to find those who have a similar experience and similar definition and want to chase their own expression of "love" together. I think this is respectful to my future lover.
I am not deterred, thank you 😊
1 member likes this comment.
1117169 - 15 Mar, 2022 - 11:44PM
@Naughty But Niche
I understand what you have in mind, but think you are chasing a chimera.
Love is an overwhelming and overarching emotion. It cannot be compartmentalised or contained then put back in its box like an object which has served its purpose, like a lawnmower is put back in its shed when the grass is cut, to be brought out when next needed, or a tap that can be turned on and off on demand to slake your thirst ( Desire). To adopt this attitude would demean and disrespect your lover.
1506940 - 15 Mar, 2022 - 09:22PM
When I joined IE in the first lockdown people were saying they wanted sex and no strings, like affairs were all about the carnal.
This time, I see people talking about connection and even love in an affair!
For me I want a connection that's like a relationship; yes even love! But a limited love. Like a significant tree in all its glory, and stable too, but one that just won't develop. Love in the image of a glorious oak tree, perfect in form and function except its roots are pruned...in reality, a Bonsai tree! It has all the look of a well rooted rationship only it is kept small and in it's place.
I don't want my IE relationship to progress into anything society understands. What I want is the connection in each date, each hotel meet to be a secret love that only we know about. A deep feeling that spills over into texts too, on going excitement! Really, a traditional affair of two people who relish the stolen moments and find solace in each other. I know I'll find him x
4 members like this comment.
ClassyLady77 - 15 Mar, 2022 - 06:25PM
@Paula99 yes definitely..
I just knew straight away with my last affair.. He ticked all my boxes and more. It’s been hard finding someone else… I won’t give up
TheBoredHousewife - 15 Mar, 2022 - 10:16AM
@Paula99
Indeed. 100% once - maybe
100% more than once - one must be incredibly jammy 😃
Paula99 - 15 Mar, 2022 - 05:29AM
Some folk are always searching for something and never find it..
It is difficult when you have had one affair that ticks all the boxes..
To find it twice in one lifetime is rare..😊
kindpassion - 14 Mar, 2022 - 09:50PM
Everyone wants something different and wow some very different ! For me genuine nice person who is able to chat is the starting point. After that I’ve got no preconceived ideas.. but need a connection…
2 members like this comment.
Mirror Shades - 14 Mar, 2022 - 08:41PM
It's not difficult to know what we are looking for.... Finding it however can be more challenging...
2 members like this comment.
Doricles - 14 Mar, 2022 - 08:00PM
CIL1973’s response resonates with me. Getting physical with someone is great as far as it goes but those secret assignations are much more fulfilling when the parties involved have taken the time to get to know one another and there’s a spark or some chemistry between them. Text messages, chats on WhatsApp, Kik or Snapchat, and the sharing of naughty images (not of oneself), adds to the mix, and helps build the excitement and anticipation of that first meet. An illicit encounter is always far more rewarding with someone who’s not a complete stranger. There are ladies (and men) out there who charge by the hour if that’s the kind of illicit encounter you’re drawn to!
1 member likes this comment.
1488125 - 14 Mar, 2022 - 06:40PM
I am looking for an old fashioned affair, looking for the intimacy, talking, chatting on the phone about your day. I want to be there for the ups and downs. Intimacy is far more than just sex, it is baring your soul, your vulnerability and trusting a person with that vulnerability. It is about accepting another person warts and all. I do want sex, but I want a illicit sex that sets yours heart racing. Knowing that you can’t access your lover every day. I don’t want one night stands, but rather a shared passion that is so discreet and private. That allows you a special kind of freedom to experience a difference.
11 members like this comment.
Chas652 - 14 Mar, 2022 - 05:19PM
Unlike Bono I don’t have a target or a checklist. So the statement is correct to a degree. You’ll know when you’ve found it. And of course you can come here looking for one thing and find another? As red_poppy says keep an open mind
CAE255 - 14 Mar, 2022 - 02:50PM
Not sex. At least not primarily sex. Really it is somebody to get to know, somebody whom with whom you can share and discuss intimate matters in a way that conventional social interaction does not allow. Even if it does lead to meeting up, you're still going to be spending most of the time chatting and getting to know each other. Sex is an issue of course, but it's not the primary driver. If it is I suspect it ends up being unsatisfactory.
4 members like this comment.
1507214 - 14 Mar, 2022 - 02:19PM
Seems to be a bit of a vicious circle:
We're relying on a profile that has been written by a species that has never been good at selling themselves so we pick up on key words or phrases that we 'think' are attractive to us.
Messages are sent, read by the recipient who then checks out our profile; sees nothing they find attractive in return and then ignores the sender.
Do 'I' know what I want? YES.
Can I make any potential contact understand that through un-emotive text alone? NO
This isn't a fantasy after all, it's based on our desire to be physical....
....eventually/hopefully 😆😆
Onwards and upwards.....
2 members like this comment.
Doc Johnson - 14 Mar, 2022 - 11:19AM
I often find who I'm looking for but it very rarely results in an affair as I'm not a stereotypical serial seducer of married women. I can think of at least four at work that I fancy the pants off. I often enjoy a bit of a flirt but nothing more.
1117169 - 14 Mar, 2022 - 10:56AM
If you don't know what you want, you don't know what to look for.
1 member likes this comment.
Cal_1980 - 11 Mar, 2022 - 02:53PM
We're all of us looking for an excuse to cheat! plain and simple we can dress it up how we like "missing romance" " its gone stale" "need excitement" etc. etc. We are all looking to cheat and get away with it. accept it and enjoy it.
2 members like this comment.
Paula99 - 06 Mar, 2022 - 07:44PM
There is no simple answer to this....your mind wants to over complicate it...
4 members like this comment.
Mirror Shades - 06 Mar, 2022 - 06:42PM
No, you can't always get what you want
But if you try sometime, you'll find
You get what you need.....
7 members like this comment.
1501784 - 06 Mar, 2022 - 03:44PM
Yes and no
As I am a curious creature and an open minded romantic. Some of the most interesting conversations I’ve had on here helped me realise I should not be putting myself in a pigeon hole - I got surprised!
Above all, I am looking for love.
The kind that is not just sex - to me, it is the romance, the connection, being intimate and playful, not just in bed or about sex. In other words, looking for a lover.
12 members like this comment.
1501784 - 06 Mar, 2022 - 11:00AM
I am yet to find my perfect date but I am enjoying the search. Loving this site!
2 members like this comment.
1508919 - 06 Mar, 2022 - 10:38AM
I thought I found what I was looking for some months ago , turns out it wasn’t him… Worse mistake of my life . So back again and fingers crossed this time . Now talking to a lovely man ,with no hidden agenda.. fingers crossed and here’s to a lot of fun finding out x
3 members like this comment.
Mad World - 06 Mar, 2022 - 09:05AM
The answer is no. Even Bono says it over and over when he sings
🎵 But I still haven’t found, what I’m looking for 🎵
Easy
2 members like this comment.
1478393 - 10 Jan, 2022 - 11:26PM
Looking for someone like my first girlfriend…I started dating later than most, no particular reason. We it happened, it was an amazing exciting time, exploring and learning soo much about each other, completely filled with butterflies for us both. I’m guessing I won’t find those feelings again but getting close would be incredible.. Alison are you out there?
Caroline Red - 21 Dec, 2021 - 04:39PM
personally if a man can't handle my buns i lose interest
4 members like this comment.
EmnEm123 - 21 Dec, 2021 - 01:41PM
@Old Sapper
There isn't much of an imbalance between numbers of men and women, perhaps an excuse for you.
Tea and a bun?
Have you ever had a young day in your life?
5 members like this comment.
Old Sapper - 09 Dec, 2021 - 07:57PM
Given the imbalance between numbers of men and numbers of women, the ladies can afford to be more selective.
Me? If a lady is happy to meet and, even it does not go beyond a pleasant walk followed by a shared pot of tea and a sticky bun, then I am more than content to share my time with her.
2 members like this comment.
Countess J - 18 Nov, 2021 - 03:06PM
I know exactly what I am looking for. I took the time to compose a detailed description of the type of man I am seeking to meet. Unfortunately more than 80% of the men who contact Me don't bother to read...instead they just focus on the photos.
Puppy6411 - 18 Nov, 2021 - 02:09PM
I tend to have a better idea of what I don't want, rather than what I do.
4 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 11 Nov, 2021 - 10:49AM
PS: I also do not report my trolls ... I prefer them to be seen for the sad losers that they are and be hanged by their own petard! 😅
2 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 11 Nov, 2021 - 10:41AM
P1 - 10:50PM
Totally agree about indiscriminate blocking being childish ... it is also cowardly.
The only time I would ever block anyone is when they are rude and/or abusive for either no reason or because they have been rejected.
5 members like this comment.
Peaches1 - 10 Nov, 2021 - 10:50PM
Freestanding - 10 Nov, 2021 - 05:17PM
I think blocking is very childish. My daughter blocks friends all the time on social media and she's 12. The only time I block people is when they turn into an unwanted pest. I've been blocked a few times myself and just find it hilarious.
2 members like this comment.
1117169 - 10 Nov, 2021 - 07:04PM
@ Freestanding
It seems to me that some people on here are either so nervous about it that they panic when they realise they are talking to a real person who actually might want to meet them " In real life" as some describe it, or they have no intention of meeting anyone at all but just want to flirt and chat to relieve their boredom and boost their ego.
Either way they will use the first contrived excuse they can as justification to block and ghost you and either delete their profile or find another mug.
1 member likes this comment.
1201733 - 10 Nov, 2021 - 05:17PM
Why is it that when I return a comment with one that the lady doesn’t quite like, I get immediately blocked
I think it’s too easy to block someone for very trivial reasons
Discuss
4 members like this comment.
Luckychances1 - 08 Nov, 2021 - 06:47PM
Omg just read a comment men wanting sex from beginning and anal oh my lord should I be on this site
1 member likes this comment.
Luckychances1 - 08 Nov, 2021 - 06:32PM
Thought this might be chat room to chat and receive chat back am I doing something wrong
Have you just got wait for messages to pop up
Luckychances1 - 08 Nov, 2021 - 06:25PM
I know what am looking for have for 8 year but never found it
1 member likes this comment.
Nice knight - 08 Nov, 2021 - 06:16PM
I like it when women say they wouldn't consider a poor man a bald man, a short man a plump man. It makes it easy to rule out the kind of woman I wouldn't be interested in and saves lots of wasting my time. I appreciate the honesty 👍 says the short, bald plump poor man 😂😂😂
4 members like this comment.
1487452 - 04 Nov, 2021 - 08:03PM
I found something almost perfect and I wasn’t looking .
Four years later and I want to do it again… but I might find something else!
“The tragedy of *your* time, my young friends, is that you may get exactly what you want.“
2 members like this comment.
1350599 - 04 Nov, 2021 - 03:37PM
I bet the most interesting people I have come across do not know what they are looking for, but always keep stretching their horizons.
Life is a self enhancing process ... perhaps why we are all here, seeking that.
Sexystallion - 02 Nov, 2021 - 08:07PM
I know what I'm looking for but it's just a matter of time until I find it. 😕
1479736 - 01 Nov, 2021 - 08:01AM
Exactly!
Although I always need my car keys, but can never find them!
1 member likes this comment.
Steveb90 - 31 Oct, 2021 - 10:42AM
I go upstairs to look for something then forget what I’m looking for when I get there lol
1 member likes this comment.
1448078 - 31 Oct, 2021 - 08:28AM
I don’t think you ever really know what you want
1 member likes this comment.
Youandme2 - 30 Oct, 2021 - 09:23AM
You think you've found it ..and then they turn out to have another side that's not so great. Reality of life really lol x
5 members like this comment.
1117169 - 30 Oct, 2021 - 08:40AM
PS
Or unrealistic expectations.
1 member likes this comment.
1117169 - 30 Oct, 2021 - 08:06AM
This sounds like the classic excuse for endless browsing and time wasting because If you do eventually find something that you know you want, you obviously do know what you want from the outset, you just have commitment phobia.
2 members like this comment.
Sanosatr - 29 Oct, 2021 - 09:43AM
I know what I want, however being on here for the 2nd week, I guess you have to make some compromises. I have had a few laughs with women, but has not progressed other than that. Nonetheless I will keep searching and hopefully attract someone's attention.
FluffyClouds - 28 Oct, 2021 - 12:25PM
I know women say they are inundated with messages. I had that issue for a while until I added my deal breakers. Height and having hair the main ones. That cut a lot of my messages down. Now I know at least my messages are from men I really could be interested in. Saves me messaging over and over again 'sorry you're not my type' and saves men the agro.
1 member likes this comment.
1481186 - 27 Oct, 2021 - 07:53PM
People seem to be far too prescriptive. Hunting unicorns is only going to lead to disappointment. Now, I could tell you a few things I’m not looking for, that’s easy. But in terms of what I am looking for, who knows? I’d love to be surprised.
3 members like this comment.
NikOLo - 27 Oct, 2021 - 04:49PM
I know.
Like anything, it takes some work to build something worth while. People are free and welcome to want whatever they wish, but relying on providence to deliver some perfect person will likely lead to disappointment. People aren’t props to desire , they don’t exist to meet our arbitrary whims.
I’m open to being surprised, and I feel confident that I will find a great match, regardless of what my imagination may have anticipated.
1304949 - 27 Oct, 2021 - 04:13PM
Yes I know what I’m looking for, finding it is more difficult…
1 member likes this comment.
FemmeLibre - 26 Oct, 2021 - 11:32PM
I think depends on what one is looking for. If you are after one night or just nsa sex, then probably expectations are not that defined, just some physical attraction will do. But if you are expecting some emotional and intellectual connection along with physical than you pretty well know what you are looking for. Whether you find it or not that s another question
7 members like this comment.
Ddonna - 26 Oct, 2021 - 11:04PM
I know what I want. And I’m defo not shy in getting it if I want it 😉
2 members like this comment.
Paula99 - 26 Oct, 2021 - 06:09PM
It took me 2 years to find Peter...I found him just by accident...his profile appeared inside my filters(another site)...I never looked back and it lasted 4 years...he was my lover...my mentor and my friend and we have stayed friends....yes we both fell in love ...but we realised that it can't go on forever...you can love 2 people..❤
5 members like this comment.
ExoticOrchid - 26 Oct, 2021 - 05:18PM
Only Sachin - 02:34PM
Ahh the Sixty Four Thousand dollar question! Are you sure those "ladies" exist? 🤔
2 members like this comment.
Imneverg - 26 Oct, 2021 - 05:04PM
I know what I would like here. But it's finding the lady that wants the same. I've chatted to a few lady's this is only my second month here. Hopefully I will find that lady that wants my attention and spend time together
1475619 - 26 Oct, 2021 - 03:57PM
I think the only way IE could even up the numbers is to charge men a lot more, I would probably pay it if they did that
1 member likes this comment.
Only1Sachin - 26 Oct, 2021 - 02:34PM
Ladies! Can any woman tell me why my messages are never answered? I have just viewed my last three pages of Messages, 45 in total, 3 replies, one of those was from IE! What am I doing wrong?
FluffyClouds - 26 Oct, 2021 - 01:57PM
VioletLady - there's nothing wrong in knowing your worth.
3 members like this comment.
1439137 - 26 Oct, 2021 - 01:14PM
I have found the longer I’m on IE the more I understand what I don’t want. I have met all sorts of guys, some cool and some nuts! But I still haven’t for the right one! After 10 months….. it must be me?
8 members like this comment.
hazle-eyes - 26 Oct, 2021 - 01:00PM
I know what I am looking for but I don’t think I’m what they are looking for alas.. 5 months of trying this time and been on here 3 years overall dipping in and out.
1466140 - 26 Oct, 2021 - 12:33PM
I know exactly what I am looking for - a LTR with a special woman. One who wants the same as me.
FluffyClouds - 26 Oct, 2021 - 12:10PM
I know what I want and I'm not prepared to compromise, I have tried that on here and it didn't work out, so might as well stick to what I'm looking for. I'm not downgrading from what I have at home. Sounds harsh, but I'm not desperate. If it takes a few months, then it takes a few months.
5 members like this comment.
Micky950 - 26 Oct, 2021 - 11:45AM
I know what I’m looking for but girls and boys generally look for different things. Girls need to know someone a little bit before jumping into bed where as a lot of men like straight sex or request anal from the word go.
1 member likes this comment.
1475619 - 26 Oct, 2021 - 11:43AM
I think I have a good idea of what I want from a woman but it’s not been easy to find so far
1318888 - 26 Oct, 2021 - 10:23AM
I feel like i know what i want 🙋♀️
2 members like this comment.
Kismet - 26 Oct, 2021 - 10:18AM
I think most people here come into it with an open mind - not sure what we're looking for but we'll know when we find it.
Here Comes Your Man - 26 Oct, 2021 - 09:47AM
You can have all sorts of expectations, experience has taught me that expectations are very rarely met. They're either way below or totally exceeded.
1 member likes this comment.
Wild & Free - 26 Oct, 2021 - 09:46AM
Yeah 100%. You have a vision of what you want in your head ofc but not everyone fits that picture. What is brilliant is when someone surprises you and makes you realises you wanted more than you could possibly imagine - in the best of ways.
You never know what you want until it hits you in the face :'D
1 member likes this comment.
Currently online:
Registered Users: 680
