Comments (159)

Legs&Eyes - 07 Jan, 2024 - 08:30PM

Exotic...

Nope, me neither.
For me, its the mentally distinguishing between a 'boyfriend' and an 'affair'... for my headspace to stay in the right place, affairs are not something I'd conduct in my own bed.... I know many singles would, but just not me....

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ExoticOrchid - 07 Jan, 2024 - 08:02PM

Not all singles will entertain an IE at home ... this single definitely doesn't ... a neutral place aka a hotel is the way to go!

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Bobby224 - 07 Jan, 2024 - 07:29PM

Just talking from my experience. I've had two long term affairs, one with a married woman and the other was a single girl. Both were excellent and I trusted both fully with my situation. The single woman just loved her own space and wanted a man's company when she felt the need. To be fair meeting a single woman who has her own place is a lot easier and in more of comfortable environment. Personally I have no problem with either.

ExoticOrchid - 07 Jan, 2024 - 05:16PM

TDiM - 02:34PM

AMEN from me too!!! 👏

(I will be a pariah in my social group as well)

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Legs&Eyes - 07 Jan, 2024 - 03:44PM

The Difference is Me - 07 Jan, 2024 - 02:34PM


AMEN!
To ALL that you have said!

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Paula99 - 07 Jan, 2024 - 02:47PM

Handsomeandmore…

Some of us here know that it’s not good to place people in stereotypical boxes …..we do understand that relationships break down and that an adjustment period is necessary….
What ruffles my feather is when the OP comes straight out of a long term commitment and hasn’t gone through the ‘getting over it ‘ part..as this tends to creep into your new affair as they haven’t put the old one ‘to bed’ ?
Angry spouses/husbands …kids involved …this all has an impact on your currant affair….as it is we don’t want the extra drama but just the extra marital sex/intimacy etc etc.

Not everyone is the same 👍

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The Difference is Me - 07 Jan, 2024 - 02:34PM

I have been on/off this site since 2005/6 ish and been very lucky to have had a couple of long term affairs all with married men. It's fair to say that I have had about 100 dates during this period and obviously chatted to hundreds more! Feedback from men is this and don't shoot the messenger married ladies! I've been told in the main that it's the married ladies who want an escape and dare I say a bolt hole from their marriage. I can't speak for all singles but I have built up a lovely independent life and want to keep it that way. There's just a bit that needs filling now and again. I cherish my space as much as a married and if it comes to losing things then my kids would disown me if they thought I was entertaining married men!! Any liaison comes with a risk. I've had a married 'stalk' me and found out information about me that I hadn't divulged. Us singles aren't pariahs. We just want the excitement and to leave the boring bits behind and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.

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1642572 - 07 Jan, 2024 - 01:10PM

I know exactly how you feel. Worse of all, I’m a man and everyone thinks that you just want one thing. But this is not always true.
When our relationships break down the last thing we all want is to jump into another full on relationship, but we really want to be able to give affection, passion and all the good things we have inside us to someone and share good times, laughter and all the things we have to offer to someone else. This is even the people we meet are in a relationship but still craving and wanting what we all have to give. There must be someone that doesn’t believe that you are just looking to get between the sheets with as many as possible?

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giggly hamster - 02 Jan, 2024 - 11:11PM

Just be honest.

If you've not perhaps been in a full time relationship then you'll never understand the risks that those who have run signing up to this lifestyle choice.

There's a big difference between a single person who's never had everything to lose, and a single person who knows what it is to have a marriage or partnership torn apart by indiscretion, but only maturity will teach you that.

Nobody wants to ruin a marriage, that's why they''re here. A single person who has just come out of say a thirty year relationship is more than aware of what's at stake than someone who has never had to support anything other than their trousers.

Nobody judges, everyone goes in eyes wide open and if you say yes you can't then say it hurts.
Kindness, understanding and compassion go a long way in things like this, and the risks are known to all.

Anybody who has been in this situation will know that what starts as harmless fun can turn into something very complicated with one wrongly timed word.

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Doricles - 29 Dec, 2023 - 10:09AM

It’s interesting how these conversations end up going down so many different rabbit holes and how hostile they become in the process! IMO, it’s an “Illicit encounter” provided at least one of the ppl taking part is married, is in a long term relationship or they have a current boyfriend or girlfriend! The clue’s in the title! If you embark in a relationship with someone new when you’re already in a relationship, then you’re doing something illicit, as in you’re doing something that you don’t want the other person in your life to know about! Personally, I don’t care if IE members are single or not. Singles may not have as much to lose as those in existing relationships but they will experience the roth of a disgruntled partner if their dalliances are discovered! We all have the freedom of choice when it comes to deciding who we want to have a relationship with …. especially a physical relationship 🤷🏻‍♂️

 1 member likes this comment.