Lady's First

About Me:

I love feeling, well, alive. I'm in no great 'need' as life's great anyway but I love the idea of also having an illicit, intimate ongoing relationship with someone whose company, personality and body I can truly savour and enjoy (occasionally). I feel the French seem to have the right approach, well in this area anyway!

I'm in no rush incidentally as 'slow' can be good. I feel that desire and arousal are more a state of mind, rather than something purely physical. That's not to say that endless e-mails do it for me if there's no, how shall I say... delivery. But likewise, the 'Wham, bam, thank you ma'am' brigade are basically missing the plot and miss the real, deep aliveness that comes from true, uninhibited and passionate intimacy.

Hey, I'm sounding much too deep there for someone who has three Weetabix in the mornings after a run or row so let's be superficial again...

Do you feel that many of the profiles read a little like 'motherhood and apple pie'? Has anyone actually written the antithesis of the normal profile?...

'I'm ugly, unexciting and incredibly needy. I have the intelligence of an amoeba although my piles have generally improved recently. I drive a Robin Reliant, have poor skin and only have my rear teeth. I'm impoverished, slippery and find it extremely hard to make friends. My speech impediments can get rather irritating after a while but I make up for that by demonstrating my innate ability to recount my train spotting log. I'm under 5 foot, overweight, have poor manners and never worry about personal hygiene. I am insensitive, judgemental and never listen to any one else's opinion.'

It would be refreshing in some ways but probably not that expedient in others!

Anyway, moving swiftly on... ME? You actually want to know about me, the person and not that I wear boxers with black socks and generally have abysmal fashion sense?

Okay then... Well contrary to first impressions I don't have a moustache and I'm not coloured red, although I do burn easily!

SIZE? What, do you mean my height? Well I'm 6'3", 13 stone with size 12 feet.

LOOKS? 7/10 but then I'm quite happy being deluded.

INTELLIGENCE? I enjoy talking / listening with anyone about anything, especially people who are positive, but does it really matter to you whether I know what Oxytocin is? I've just re-read that and it's not actually true. I have to admit that I do not really enjoy talking about celebrities, soap operas, childbirth, colostomy bags, commuter journeys or embroidery.

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE? Now I start to cringe a little, I am a bloke after all! I am definitely improving on this dimension though and will try to get in touch with my feminine side just for you (honest)

PERSONALITY? I know, let's approach this one differently....

Words / phrases that I DON'T LIKE: Health & safety, tax form (in fact ANY kind of form!), brussel sprouts, insurance, judgemental, halitosis, 'Traffic jam ahead', 'Your call is important to us...', shag, superficial, bunion, depression, worry and 'My husband has just been paroled'

Words / phrases that I DO LIKE: Authenticity, passion, energy, 'Yes !', positive, fun, growth, laughter, excitement, openness, integrity, 'What time ?', random, humour, confidence, risk, 'I used to be a gymnast...', aliveness, empathy, vibrancy and one of my favourites: anticipation.


Well, if you're still with me after that diatribe and on anything approaching a similar wavelength then why not say hello ? (please not via those cringe worthy Virtual Kisses though, pretty please!) Oh, and if I've paid my dues you'll know I'll always respond!

Thank you for reading.

Enjoy your life
x

Ideal Partner:

This little poem I wrote should be started slowly, with a developing rythmic crescendo building to the climactic end! (...and no prizes for guessing whether I've got children!):


Old love.
New love.

Too big. Too small.
Too short. Too tall.

Too near. Too far.
Too straight. Too bizarre.

Too loose. Too tight.
Too loud. Too quiet.

Too clingy. Too sad.
Too haughty. Too mad.

Too wrinkly. Too baggy. Too moley. Too saggy.
Too needy. Too hairy. Too broody. Too scary,

Too young. Too old.
Too hot (sic). Too cold.

Too weird. Too straight. Too simple...

Wait. Just right!

Just right?
Just right. Just right...

x

Other Interests:

Nature, Music - Alternative, Music - World, Cycling, Golf, Travel / Sightseeing

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